Girls. Women. Lasses. B*tches. Whatever you want to call us, we’re vicious. Some even say we eat the hearts of those who do not suit us. Whether we are short, tall, skinny, or chubby, we were taught not to settle until the right guy comes knocking on our door. This of course means that a lot of wrong guys are going to come-a-knockin’ first. But like a tennis player uses a racquet to volley the ball back to the other side of the court, women have a secret weapon of their own to bat guys down: rejection. Sometimes rejecting someone is quick and painless. Other times, puppy dog eyes tear at our heartstrings. Let us take a look at the ten different reactions guys exhibit when their advances are shot down.
1. The Rinse and Repeat
No matter how many times you tell this knight in bronze armor to bounce, he keeps on bouncing right back up to you. It is as if he does not know what the word “no” means. Or maybe he is just that into getting rejected. Either way, it is not cute.
2. The Statue
Knock-knock, is anybody there? As soon as you deliver him the disappointing news, a blank stare takes over his face, his arms go limp, and any signs of life disappear. Back to Earth, buddy; staring at us does not change our mind, it just creeps us out.
3. The Drowning His Sorrows
So he might not have scored a night out with you, but judging from the slur in his words and the sharp odor of his breath, it seems as though he scored a night out with a bottle. This guy takes rejection so personally that he needs to erase any memory of it ever happening.
4. The Full of Contempt
They can hear this guy’s sarcastic taunts all the way in China. His mouth says one thing but his actions say another. Have your sarcasm detector handy to decipher what exactly the point is that he is trying to convey.
5. The Scary One
You know those self-defense classes you keep throwing out the brochures to? Well, now is the time to actually sign up. This kind of guy snaps at the thought of a woman not swooning at his advances. The broken blood vessels in his eyes and the spit flying out of his mouth make you wish you had the long barrel of a gun between you and his terrifying antics.
6. The Rebounder
You have the nerve to roll your eyes at his mediocre pick-up lines? Oh, he will show you all right: by getting with the next thing with a pulse wherever he might happen to be. So sorry Fido, looks like you might have to scoot over.
7. The Puppy Dog Eyes
His eyes get big and his lips start to droop down at the corners. It is as if the only thing that is keeping him from crying in front of you is the thought of being taunted by his friends for all of time. Quick! Turn away before you give him a sympathy date.
8. The Stalker
Similar to the Rinse and Repeat, the Stalker just does not know how to take no as an answer. But, instead of getting in your face about it, he is constantly dancing around your periphery, just barely staying out of your sight. Looks like you just earned yourself a second shadow.
9. The Cocky Jerk
Almost as soon as the word “no” passes your lips, this guy acts as if you are last week’s news. Oh, you thought that he was actually asking you out? As if.
10. The One That Got Away
If you are anything like me, talking to an attractive guy is both scary and as awkward as a baby giraffe on roller skates. Instead of pursuing him back, you freak out, and go with safely declining him. Even before you say it, your brain is already kicking itself. He takes the rejection so fluidly that you can hardly believe it ever happened.
Whatever his reaction might be, stick with your decision, and always remember: