Growing up in today’s society most of us assume that prince charming is not that far away. As teenagers we are exposed to movies in which the female protagonist goes to university and instantly finds the “man of her dreams”. Movies such as: The prince and me, Step up, What a girl wants, Sydney White and Bring it on are just a few to list. Who could blame us for believing it would be a huge factor in our university experience? It would be a lie to state that I did not have this mentality. We spend a huge portion of our lives searching for the perfect man. But what is perfect? Every women has an ideal type, what we believe is our version of the perfect man. Because we deserve the best. We deserve perfection. But could our ideas of perfection be misconstrued? Overrated? Even impossible and nonexistent? Could our ideals be keeping us from meeting the right one? As collegiettes there are a few mentalities we need to stop embracing and new ideals we shouldn’t let go of.
The ideal body
When asked about our dream person we are quick to label out a hundred physical characteristics. “He has to have a nice athletic body, because that means he can ride a horse into the sunset.”, “Height is really important because I love wearing heels and I don’t want to tower over him.”, “Broad shoulders to defend me with.”, “His eyes have to shine like the stars.”; “He can’t have a uni-brow because those are just gross”. Yes, some of those reasons are ridiculous but we’ve all thought of at least one of those at some point. Having standards isn’t a problem. It’s good to have standards because you know what you want. Never lower your standards and expectations, unless you think you are going to marry Ryan Gosling, then you just need to stop. Be open to other ideals because you never know what’s truly underneath the wrapping!
The ideal prince
I would love to start by giving Disney a huge applause, they finally acquired the idea of true romance in their films. If you haven’t seen Frozen yet, drop everything you are doing and go watch it, or at least wait till the end of this article. It’s the best Disney love story ever written since the Lion King. I’m sorry to break it to you ladies, but the prince ideal doesn’t exist! No I’m not saying your boyfriend can’t be a prince to you; but you are not going to end up at a faculty ball or frat party where a handsome man of perfection will approach you, ask you to twerk with him and then proceed to ask for your hand in marriage the next time you see him on campus. Life doesn’t work like that! Life does throw good men your way so stop turning down every nice guy because he doesn’t first appear to be Prince Charming. The guy you ignored could turn out to be the guy you couldn’t live without. One date won’t kill you, unless he’s a serial killer or some creepy dude who added you on Facebook with no friends in common. I would avoid those.
Ying and Yang
The ideas that opposites attract or don’t work at all, are both just rubbish. It all depends on who you are. Looking for someone who is the complete opposite of you is a little silly. You need to have at least one thing in common. What are you going to talk about if you have no common ground?! Then there is the other end of the spectrum that states you have to be completely identical? Who comes up with these? If we wanted identical partners we would just marry ourselves. There’s a difference between having a lot in common and being the same person. It’s alright to have a lot in common, you can do a lot of the same things together, but then you miss out on the adventure of finding a common ground or a new interest.
The friend component
“I can’t date him, we know each other too well” or “I don’t know him, but he’s so perfect”. Wait, what? Where is the remote on life so I can press the pause button? We all need to just stop. If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard either of those phrases uttered, or something close to it, I would be vacationing in the British Virgin Islands.
I can’t fathom why it would be a bad idea to date someone you know “too well”. The best relationships start from friendships. Relationships that are jumped into seldom work. With friendship first, you know all of each other’s likes/dislikes, allergies, favourite foods/flowers, perfect gift ideas and dream vacation locations. What in the world is wrong with that? There is a very large difference between not being attracted to a person and not wanting to date them just because you “know them to well”. Stop and reflect.
“I don’t know him but he’s so perfect” um and who told you this, Aphrodite? Did Cupid come to you and say “this is the one, just trust me”? If you are attracted to someone go make friends with them! Never rush anything; it will get awkward when you realize you dislike their personality. I’ve watched too many of my friends do this over and over again. I dated this guy for a while who seemed “perfect” for the first few weeks. He turned out to be the world’s biggest d-bag.
Be open, be patient
Be open to the prospects that come your way, because you could miss out on your soul mate. You never know who you are going to fall for. Above all. Relax, take a breather, and stop looking. Life has a way of working itself out. When the time comes for you to meet the one, you’ll know. We have our whole lives ahead of us to find Mr. Right. Focus on the people who matter the most right now; your friends and family. Travel the world, finish school, go on a road trip, embrace your passions and hobbies. When you least expect it, your other half will show up.
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