Faith can be a touchy subject for a lot of people. No one can look at a person and tell what their life has been like, their beliefs, their background, or really anything about them. That’s why I have had different approaches when discussing my beliefs with others as a Christian in college and in a sorority. This past year, my relationship with God and with Christianity as a whole has dramatically changed and I want to tell you just a little bit more about my journey so far.
Freshman year
So we all know that Freshman year is one where you’re trying to “find yourself,” or whatever that means, meeting new people, figuring out a schedule, trying to balance living on your “own”, and enjoying all the fun things college life has to offer. Well, I did the same thing. I grew up in church, and my mom made sure we were all awake early Sunday morning so we could go volunteer for the first service and then go sit in on the second one. It became routine. I put very little thought into God or my beliefs on any day besides Sunday. Monday would come around and the anxiety of the week would just take all my thoughts from anything that I was taught that past Sunday. This is how all of high school was for me, I considered myself a Christian but didn’t actually have a relationship with God. Then when freshman year of college came around, I thought “oh my mom can’t make me wake up early for church anymore,” so I never went to church, never opened my Bible, and never really prayed unless I was asking God for a favor. I knew something was missing because that was a really hard year for me; the anxiety and sadness were so prevalent in my everyday thoughts and most days I didn’t have a lot of hope. I felt that something had to change I just didn’t quite know what it was.
Turning Point
Spring of my Freshman year, I joined Delta Zeta. I was so excited about all the friends I was making, the events we were going to, and all the fun things that came with joining a sorority. And honestly, DZ was not the place where I thought I would find myself running back to God. But, in my Sophomore year, I decided to join the DZ Bible study and it was the best decision I’ve ever made. During that first meeting, our leader asked everyone to think to themselves “where are you at with your relationship with God?” I sat there quietly for a few minutes because I thought to myself “I am as far from God as I’ve ever been.” And that was when I dived into a new and deeper relationship with God that has transformed me as a person and follower of Christ. And I know what some of you might be thinking, “oh cool it’s just another Jesus girl.” And yeah, that kinda is me. Before, I was so ashamed to be known as that. But now I know who God says I am and I’m no longer scared of that judgment.
Another big thing I’ve recently learned was that true Christians don’t judge others. I always thought that Christianity had a part in looking down on what other people were doing, but this year I realized that wasn’t the case at all. Instead, I realized there was this sense of support and love that I didn’t feel in other places. And don’t worry, there are still some days where I struggle to get up for church, open my Bible, or even just pray. That’s the beauty I’ve found in Christianity, that God is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow and if I have nothing else to count on, I know I have Him. P.S. I know that sounds so cheesy but it’s so true.
So, if you’ve gotten through this whole thing and realize you feel a little like how I felt, I want you to know you can reach out to your local churches, Bible studies at your college, or even just a friend who will listen. And if you still have questions I challenge you to dive into some research, try to find the answers to your questions, and above all else, just know you’re not alone no matter where you’re at.