Did you know that Michelle Zauner, or as we know her, Japanese Breakfast, is Korean? She chooses to go under this name because of a gif she found on Tumblr of a Japanese breakfast. She thought this invoked calm, familiar feelings, almost like an English breakfast. Who knew that this name she had chosen for herself a decade ago would amount to something bigger? How cool is that? Japanese Breakfast is one of the more fascinating artists to hit the Indie-Pop music scene in the last decade. Her music is theatrical, experimental and heartbreaking all at once. The motivation behind her music is what makes her such a fascinating artist. Not only is she a musician, but she is also the author of Crying in H-Mart, her memoir exploring grief, loss and racial identity after the loss of her mother. Her experience of battling with failure and racial and personal identity while establishing herself as a musician makes her a unique artist.
Early Life
Michelle Zauner was born in Seoul, South Korea on March 29th, 1989. Shortly after, she moved with her parents to Eugene, Oregon, where she spent the rest of her childhood. It was here that Michelle dealt with the harsh reality of being Asian in a predominately white neighbourhood. She speaks about this in detail in her memoir, Crying In H-Mart, where she felt that her only way to access her Korean heritage was through her mother and her cooking. However, she never truly longed for this connection to her heritage until later in life, specifically when her mother passed away. Her complex relationship with her racial identity also created tension in her relationship with her mother. Another point of tension was when Michelle turned to music as a creative outlet, which her mother greatly disapproved of.
Grief, Failure and Music
At the age of 15, Michelle began playing at open mic nights under the alias Little Girl, Big Spoon. In 2011, after graduating from Bryn Mawr College with a journalism degree, she and three other musicians formed Little Big League, an emo band. The band stayed together for quite some time, releasing an EP in 2014. During this time, Michelle was making music under her new alias Japanese Breakfast on Bandcamp, where she released her project June. Unfortunately, she had to put her music career on hold when she received the news that her mother was dying of cancer. Her mother passed away shortly after her return home. Depressed, confused and down on herself, Michelle took a break from music and attempted to work a corporate job in New York City. She worked on her creative projects, mostly centred around the grief of losing her mother, in her free time, but it was never a priority. The lifestyle was miserable; she remarked in an interview with the A24 podcast, “If you want to excel in the corporate world, it has to consume your whole life.” With the support of her husband, she gave her music one more shot. Shortly after, she released two projects, Psychopomp (2016) and Soft Sounds from Another Planet (2017), which include some of the most beautiful songs about heartache, grief and motherhood. Some of my favourites from these albums are: “Everybody Wants to Love You,” “The Woman That Loves You,” “Boyish,” “Road Head” and “Till Death.” Through these songs and her memoir, she was able to deal with her feelings about her mom and connect with her Korean heritage on a spiritual level.
Creative Genius: Jubilee & Crying in H-Mart
I have touched on her memoir, Crying in H-Mart, briefly. This was the book-length version of her essay published in The New Yorker in 2018. Critics were quickly able to see the memoir’s beauty and it was officially released in April 2021. This book acted as the final creative project dedicated to her mother and her grief. Michelle has been a published author for quite some time. Her essays have been in Glamor, The New Yorker and Harper’s Bazaar time and time again, and she has been working to become a screenwriter and director. Her most recent project, Jubilee (2021), is one of my favourite indie albums of the last decade. In an interview, she recalled that “The album is symbolic of fighting for those rare moments of joy, it’s theatrical, boisterous and joyful… it explores how to preserve and protect that feeling.” She wanted to force that feeling of joy on herself and her listeners because it was something she was missing for so long. Some of my favourite songs from that album are “Be Sweet,” “Posing in Bondage” and “Kokomo, IN.”
To me, Japanese Breakfast is incredibly unique; no one is doing it like she is. Her story and the pain, tragedy, failure and loss she has experienced in her life are conveyed so beautifully in all aspects of her work. She will always hold a special place in my heart and drive my love of music.