I turned 18 a while ago. And I know it’s supposed to be “the milestone” and extremely fun but soon enough the word “lonely” knocked on my door of happiness. Honestly, being alone never bothered me. What became a problem was loneliness. I craved human contact. Being an adult is hard, but being one without any companionship is even harder. So it’s justified for 18 or 19-year-olds to yearn for meaningful relationships.
It seems confusing right? One moment you’re blissfully and peacefully sitting in solitude, and out of nowhere, this need for intimacy creeps up. Life took a one-eighty; from being content with my own company to being vexed with everything. I went from once cherishing relationships I wholeheartedly built to feeling extremely detached from them.
There’s no reason as to why this feeling arises. It could be anything ranging from changing circumstances to a bad breakup, and so on. So, there’s no one way to deal with it. But here’s an attempt to help you feel a little less lonely. Here’s what you can try:
1. Talk it Out
The first step is always acknowledging your feelings and talking about them. It can be your family, your friends, or literally anyone you trust. Anyone to share things with when you don’t feel good. This doesn’t exactly solve anything, but at least you will not brush your emotions aside. Always remember that there are people around who care about you immensely. So that’s a start.
2. Become part of community groups
Being part of community groups can help you bond with new people and fulfill the social connection you desire. If not, at the very least it engages you in something meaningful. Staying isolated and wondering how to fix it does not really help anyone.
3. Find your kindred spirit
If you feel lonely even when surrounded by people, this is only because you haven’t found your kindred spirit yet. Just finding people is not enough. Finding the right ones is crucial. Try to find people who share similar interests, beliefs, and values. It’s easy to bond and make a connection when there’s common ground. Look harder until you find someone and once you do, make consistent efforts in maintaining the same.
4. Do things that boost your endorphins
Read a book, play a sport or binge-watch a TV show, do whatever it is that makes you happy, or try finding a new hobby. You are less likely to feel uncomfortable with being alone when you do things that make you happy.
The number of young adults who feel lonely has been increasing in recent times, after the pandemic that is. ‘You’re not alone’ but you are on your own! You’re on your own when it comes to dealing with adulthood and no matter how tempting it might sound, texting your ex isn’t going to help.