As Valentine’s Day rolls around the corner, two thoughts come to mind: iconic romantic comedies and the struggles of modern dating. Today, finding the perfect valentine may not be as easy as it seems, especially if you are anything like Kat Stratford, the female lead from 10 Things I Hate About You. Like Kat, I too have found the modern dating pool to be quite the shallow dive, so finding a valentine calls for some additional help. Since I don’t have a wingman like Cameron James on my side, I have resorted to a modern solution for a modern problem: dating apps. But dating apps are not all they are cracked up to be, which is why I have come up with 10 Things I Hate About Tinder.
- Swiping through Tinder is the least productive way to spend my time.
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I am starting strong by confessing that I spend way too much time on Tinder, and frankly, it’s embarrassing. Like any other social media app, it is easy to pick up the phone and mindlessly swipe as the seconds, minutes and hours tick by. Of all the things I could be doing with my time, Tinder probably should not be one of them.
- The lack of conversation or any kind of communication once it is moved to any other platform.
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Sure, the conversation seems to flow well in the beginning. General questions like “What is your major? Where are you from? What are your hobbies?” can usually get the ball rolling. However, as soon as the conversation leaves Tinder, whether that be through text message, Snapchat or Instagram, all communication comes to a screeching halt. At best, I can hope for the occasionally blank snap picture, or perhaps a “Wyd?” text at an unrespectable hour of the night.
- Getting ghosted due to the absence of a genuine connection.
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The whole design of Tinder is to give people a plethora of dating options. As a result, it is easy to forget about a stranger you’ve only spoken to once or twice. Therefore, for at least half of the matches that I receive on Tinder, another half have ghosted me. But the real problem lies within the fact that it barely matters because I hardly knew them to begin with, which leads me to my next problem with Tinder.
- Emotional attachment or investment in each Tinder match is minimal at best.
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Because there are so many options on Tinder, I am constantly just swiping and swiping to see who might be next. Therefore, it can be difficult to take the time to get to know each person and try to build a real connection with them.
- It causes me to become more judgmental of people online and in person.
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At the end of the day, a Tinder match comes down to a yes or no question. Consequently, it is easy to become more judgmental of a person’s profile and reduce them to their pictures, interests and music taste. While I am sure we all must take those factors into account when dating someone, I believe Tinder encourages more of a quick judgment based on first impressions, which can then bleed over into interpersonal interactions in real life.
- Inappropriate and/or cringe-worthy pickup lines are usually the conversation starters.
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Okay, this one has me on the fence because there are times when I find pick-up lines very clever or so badly written that they’re laughable. However, I have also come across my fair share of pick-up lines that were better left set down.
- Tinder eliminates the possibility of a meet-cute.
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Call me old-fashioned or a hopeless romantic, but I love the idea of a meet-cute. Not only does it create a lasting impression, but it provides an interesting story to tell friends later. With Tinder, a meet-cute is already out of the picture since we have taken matters into our own hands and simply swiped right.
- Sharing a connection with someone and then realizing they had that same connection with one of your friends.
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Sometimes, I forget that Tinder is a global app that many people use. Therefore, the chance that the short conversation I had with one of my matches is unique is slim to none. Any kind of spark tends to fizzle out when I discover that my friend has had the same conversation with that person as well.
- After matching on Tinder, the chance of running into them increases exponentially.
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Perhaps this is a problem that I run into because I live on campus, but for some reason, as soon as I match with someone on Tinder, I am doomed to awkward run-ins everywhere. It’s one thing if we exchange smiles or a wave, but it’s an entirely different thing if we walk past each other like we weren’t just talking about our favorite song on Tinder five minutes ago. It’s safe to say I never feel safe from Tinder’s ability to connect me with people who I will most likely run into.
The final thing I hate about Tinder is the fact that I can’t seem to escape its grasp. No matter how many times I have convinced myself I don’t need it anymore or it’s useless, I always seem to find another excuse to re-download it. After all, what better way to put yourself out there without the fear of rejection? And if anything, I can occasionally check in to see if I have any new matches, which can be an exciting factor. So, dear Tinder, while there are many things I hate about you, mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you, not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.
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