The old man looks at the television’s news report and looks back at me, “What even is it?” He asked this, but I was unsure if he wanted a response. “Do you know what this TikTok is? You look young.” He doesn’t say this like a compliment.
“It’s a social media app that uses video,” I explain, thinking this is all in good faith. “I deleted it, though.”
His eyes perk up, and he continues to give me a rant about technology ruining the youth. This isn’t the first time my own polite response to someone’s (seemingly innocent) question was met with an invitation to lecture me on issues I am all too familiar with.
Of course, I am easily flustered and was not ready for battle when I left the house for a simple eye exam. I didn’t have talking points prepared as to why young people have a constant feeling of dread (I am no generational spokesperson) or even our addiction to technology (something I admit I struggle with).
“I don’t get why all the young kids think the world is ending.” He continued, “I don’t mean offense, but they have it so easy.” Later, he would reveal he only works two days a week and fishes the rest of the time.
How many times will I be trapped in a conversation, especially when I work around people, where all I can do is nod my head, smile politely and hope they get bored listening to their own monologue on the downfall of culture, humanity and social interaction due to technology? It’s as if they don’t know we know this too. We have firsthand experience. We are the ones experiencing this.
We are working with technology and against it. Phones have come up with built-in features to limit our screen time. Spotify Wrapped tells us just how many minutes we’ve had music playing in a year. Every person I know has a hobby or is trying to find some hobby to relieve the stress of the fast-paced world. Minimalism has been on the rise to counteract the overstimulation of the Internet (or so I’ve heard). And yet, technology is being made to entice us to spend as much time scrolling through feeds, using a constant stream of notifications and seemingly endless content at our beck and call.
The world has made us reliant on technology, whether that is a bad thing is up to us. But I am sick and tired of people who aren’t as enveloped in the technology we must use every day, for pleasure or work, telling us we should go back to the old ways and risk being secluded from the modern world.
“And these iPhones,” he begins again, complaining how nobody needs a thousand-dollar iPhone.
“I guess you are right,” I say with an iPhone in my jean pocket. “You could have a nice vintage muscle car if you wanted, or you could have a beat-up minivan. Both get you to the destination.” I don’t know if this was the response he wanted. He barely acknowledged my point and continued his “politely” veiled lecture.
The entire time he laughed and said mean things, probably thinking they were jokes but weren’t funny. I didn’t give him any polite, strained chuckles in response and simply raised my eyebrows at absurd statements.
“Why use email when you have snail mail.” I sarcastically responded to a statement I now cannot recall.
He turned to me, what I assumed to be serious, and said, “I don’t have email. I don’t need it.”
“Well, I guess that’s just you. I had to use an email to make my appointment.”
And I don’t mean this offensively at all because I am also here, but we’re at a Walmart Vision center for Christ’s sake. Why do I continue to let these faux-polite lectures veiled as small talk continue to happen? Maybe it’s for the possibility that just maybe it won’t turn into a lecture.
Afterward, as a treat, I went to the Goodwill Bookstore. What else could make me slightly happier than used books for cheap, possible treasures on every shelf? (I did, indeed, find some gold if you care to wonder.)
There was a bookkeeper, not much older than me, tending to the sales. A lot of the customers were older. One elder woman asked her a question, “Why books?”
“Used books,” the bookkeeper clarified and said some beautiful words on how you can find old books like a capsule of time. She said she still spends a lot of time on her phone, but she did love books.
The woman took this as an opening to begin her own observation (rather than rant, as it was much more well-intentioned) that NPR did a segment on phone addiction. She said that they were so convenient, but it was easy to get trapped.
One could say something like polite small talk, and yet some societal obligation has me in a cycle of allowing their conversational advances.
Someday I will learn to mind my own, not continue a conversation when I know it isn’t in good faith. I want to be a polite person. I don’t want to contribute to some vague idea that young kids don’t respect their elders (and I don’t really unless they earn it). And yet, I am continually met with unwarranted critiques on how I should be spending my time or how things should be. Damned if I do, damned if I don’t. These abrupt lecturers are surely the death of my own want to contribute to small talk, especially with the elderly.
Want to see more HCFSU? Be sure to like us on Facebook and follow us on Instagram, Twitter, TikTok, YouTube and Pinterest!