While knowing the lack of anxiety that a carefree spirit brings, before stepping into this new energy-preserving mindset, at one point, I couldn’t help but catch myself holding back from doing things in fear of judgment. The beauty of not caring what others think is probably the biggest weight off of my shoulders I’ve endured, while growing into who I am today. For me, my top three secret weapons to protecting my energy and making people’s doubt a little less heartwrenching are finding power in confidence, maturity and humour. Walking into a party of people you’ve never met before? No problem. Talking to a boy you are interested in but fearing rejection? Life’s too short. It’s time we start realizing that nothing is as deep or serious as we fabricate it to be in our heads, and honestly, there’s no point in trying to control or attempt to translate what people are trying to narrate about you in their already self-centred minds.
Growing up, I often felt as if I acted as a punching bag for some people because they just assumed “I could take it” or because I was just “so easy” to bother. As the tooth-gapped and beanstalk-like self, I was from the second grade to sixth, looking back now at this point in my life, I’m grateful for those people who built up my character and resilience, to say the least. The first thing the little rugrats in my elementary school classes motivated me to adopt while growing up was learning to be okay with laughing at myself and not taking life too seriously. We’ve all felt that awkward tension and laughter in a conversation when someone takes a joke a little too far, but sometimes, the best cure for lousy humour is a good smile and some wit. And thanks to pre-pubescent boys and some braces, I’ve mastered those two things quite well! When being approached by a joke that rubs you the wrong way, just think about how insecure the person attempting to make you uncomfortable is, that they need to tear you down. I’ve learned that if they feel the need to constantly shame you for who you are and for doing what brings you joy, their judgment ultimately serves you nothing in the grand scheme of things. You do not need to keep around people who make you feel like a smaller version of yourself, and you’ll thank yourself for learning to laugh it off rather than overanalyzing why some people just don’t fancy you and why there’s nothing you can do but move forward.
The second thing I often think of when doing things I once thought would attract judgment is, “Why am I even doing this in the first place.” I’ve come to find that your true purpose and trying new things that you think will fulfill you is what life is all about. With finding the key to not caring what people think comes with maturity. You’ll get to a point in your life where you really just don’t care anymore. Maturing to me is not giving people who give you judgmental and bad energy the time of day. It’s about being the bigger person in situations where it’s really hard not to fire back with a comment that stoops down to their level. Maturity will bring you to a point where you are proud of yourself and what you have created, and other people’s opinions are no longer relevant.
This brings us to my third and final secret to protecting your energy and not caring what others think of you: confidence. To me, confidence is the key to success in all aspects of life. No one questions the girl who walks into a room, knows what she wants, enjoys what she’s doing and feels good in the process. THAT girl gives the people who send her judgemental looks a smile, a wave and maybe even a compliment in hopes that the ‘judger’ finds something more positive to do with their day than making others feel unworthy. Because THAT girl is not “fake,” she’s just confident enough to know that people who once made her feel like a lesser version of herself might be the one who needs that smile and words of encouragement the most. Now, I’m not going here to write this and try to convince you that people aren’t judging you, whether you like to believe it or not, we all do! Humans are just as judgemental as they are selfish, and with that, I’ve learned that what is truly important is how you choose to let the judgment and attempts to breach your energy affect you. And ultimately, how you move forward to turn their once aggravating stares and comments into motivation for your next article…
Peace & Love,
Gracee