Listen guys, I won’t lie. This article experiment was really more for me than any of you. I’m recently single and ultimately, I have no idea how to even talk to men. My last, first, and only relationship was practically three years long and even just on top of that, I’m incredibly awkward. “Zoey you can’t be that awkward!” You’d be surprised. When I’m comfortable I’m just fine, but around those I don’t know, call me Michael Cera cause oh man am I weird. So, when it comes to flirting, I’m not the best. I’ve never really had to do it and I’ll be honest, I’m a little scared of it. So, I tried exposure therapy. And what better way of exposing myself to men than a three day weekend full of day fades? So, I tried some of the most popular flirting techniques. Did they go well? Uhm…inconclusive. But I’ll tell you how each one went!
(That’s a picture of me btw)
Technique #1: The Stare Down
The classic look across the room at someone you think is cute. I tried this MANY times throughout the day and ultimately was unsuccessful with this technique. No men magically ran over to me confessing their love, which I thought was a little odd. In their defense, it’s probably cause I don’t exactly know how to beckon men over to me with my eyes. Sometimes I forget they can actually perceive me and that maybe me just staring at them might freak them out. I don’t know! A lot of my friends have been very successful with this technique, so it’s probably just a user error.
Technique #2: Take Their Stuff
Yup, literally take their stuff. Not in like, the stealing sense, but if you see a guy who has a fun pair of sunglasses or a funny hat, go ask them if you can try it on. I did have some assistance with this from my bff (she’s the master of this), but overall I would say it was decently successful. I did talk to a lot more men this way, and they were pretty open to me trying on their stuff. Now, of course, this is risky because they could be against you trying on their stuff and then the whole operation is over. It’s just a game of luck, unfortunately.
Technique #3: Use Their Name
Men and women alike love this technique. This worked EVERY time I used it. It’s subtle, but it shows them you’re paying attention. Just a quick use of their name naturally in a sentence shows them you’re locked in. Super easy, super simple, and I would estimate it works 99% of the time (I don’t actually know, I’m not good at math).
Technique #4: Pick Up Lines
Not going to lie I chickened out on this one. I know some work, so it’s up to you if you want to try. The only ones I could come up with were super bad, so I failed on this one.
Technique #5: Laugh
Laugh! It always boosts someone’s ego when you think they’re funny, so laugh when you think it’s appropriate. Again, mix this in with a little touch on the arm and you’re golden. Don’t laugh too much though, otherwise, they might get too big of an ego and think they’re a natural comedian. Just whenever it feels natural and appropriate.
Technique #6: Be Yourself
Seriously, guys, this is always going to be the best way to flirt. If someone doesn’t want you for you, then why bother? Changing yourself to impress someone is never worth it, and if someone wants you then they’re going to want YOU! Not some made-up version of yourself! Be you and the right person will be themselves right back at you.
Was I successful? I’ll leave that up to you, reader. Ultimately, I’m alright with not being the best at flirting. If someone doesn’t want me at my Michael Cera worst, they shouldn’t get me at my best. Should you try out any of these methods, just know there are no guaranteed results. And that’s okay! The right person will come when they’re meant to, whether you attempt to flirt with them at a party, meet them in class, or some other random run-in. Stay brave and flirty out there, folks. You got this!