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Wellness > Sex + Relationships

Melt The Ice With These Hot, R-Rated Icebreaker Questions

Are you tired of asking “How do you really feel about me?” when you’re looking to get a little deeper with a crush? After the first couple of dates, and as the chemistry rises between you and a prospective partner, there are some fun ways to turn up the heat. ICYMI, whipping out some freaky icebreaker questions to ask your crush can be a great way to up the tension and get to know them better — or, should I say, intimately?

Now, it’s common to get anxious when you’re opening up and asking dirty questions to someone you’re developing feelings for. But asking some sexy icebreakers is a great way to understand your crush a little better, if they’re ready to turn up the heat. Asking these sorts of questions allows you to see if you’re compatible on an intimate level, and learn more about their preferences — enabling them to feel more comfortable asking you questions.  An added plus: hearing your crush’s thoughts and desires can be a major turn-on in itself. But, before you dive into these questions, make sure that your crush is comfortable with discussing sexual content — because asking for consent can never ruin the mood.

Here are 40 sexy questions to spice up your next text convo or date night from flirty to downright freaky. These questions are bound to get your conversations flowing… and heated, too.

  1. What’s something that gives you butterflies?
  2. What was your first impression of me?
  3. Do I make you feel nervous?
  4. Do you prefer making out or cuddling?
  5. Have you ever thought about me sexually?
  6. If I was in your room right now, what would you want to do to me?
  7. Do you like experimenting with different positions, which is your favorite?
  8. What is your opinion on love bites?
  9. What is the weirdest thing you dreamt of doing with a partner?
  10. What is the difference to you between sex and making love?
  11. You’re forced to choose one sex position for the rest of your life. What is it? 
  12. What body part do you like me to touch the most?
  13. Do you have dreams about me?
  14. What’s your biggest turn-on?
  15. What do you think your hottest quality is? 
  16. What’s your favorite type of foreplay?
  17. Have you ever sexted?
  18. If you could make three sexy wishes, what would they be? 
  19. What would you say or do if I sent you a dirty picture of me?
  20. Have you ever wanted to tear my clothes off?
  1. If you felt that I was starting to get a crush on you, what would you do?
  2. I come home from work stressed, how do you relax me?
  3.  On a scale of one to Mount Everest, how high is your sex drive?
  4. Do you prefer to give or receive?
  5. What’s something you secretly fantasize about?
  6. Do you like it rough or sensual?
  7. What was the last thing you masturbated to?
  8. What’s the hottest thing someone can say to you in bed?
  9. Do you prefer to give or receive?
  10. What’s your favorite kind of porn?
  11. Do you like sexting?
  12. Strangest item you’ve ever considered using as a sex toy?
  13. If you could describe your sex life with an emoji, what would it be?
  14. Rate your oral game on a scale of one to 10.
  15.  While having sex, would you prefer getting on top or staying down in bed?
  16. What type of outfits turn you on the most?
  17.  Would you ever take a shower with me?
  18. What’s the dirtiest thing you’ve thought about me?
  19. Do you want to play dirty truth or dare?
  20. Would you try your favorite sex position with me?

Remember: Consent is sexy, so make sure your partner is OK with turning up the heat before asking them these questions. So, if you’re down for it, get ready to let your freak flag fly!

Hollie David is a nursing student who graduated from Central Connecticut State University in May 2024. She has a passion for writing especially about women's health, mental health and feminist issues. She's been published in multiple nursing magazines from Nursing made Incredibly Easy to Imprint. She was also a staff writer for The Recorder. In Hollie's free time she loves to read, watch true crime documentaries and attend dance classes.