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Wellness

Time To Be Selfish (In A Good Way!)

The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at SBU chapter.

Recently, I asked myself a question. “Olivia, why do you put others before yourself?”

If I was asked that question when I started high school, I would have told you it’s because it made me happy making other people happy. But now, I ask myself a different question, “Is it worth making people happy if I’m not?”

Throughout my life, there are times when I will disregard my well-being to make sure someone else is okay. I will be having the worst day possible, but I will still go out of my way to ensure that the people I care about are okay. In some ways, it shows how much of a caring person I am. But, in other cases, it feels like I’m using so much of my energy to care for someone else when I should be using it to take care of myself.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I still love showing my friends how much I appreciate them through words of affirmation and gift-giving. It’s one of my favorite things to do as I enjoy showing my empathetic side. But I realized after a long time, that I needed to do that for myself. After all, I’m in college. I should be trying new things and meeting different people! I shouldn’t let myself get attached to a routine of constantly doing things just to please others. Although I won’t stop being that friend that will stick by you no matter what, I need to make some room in my life for ME.

I understand this journey will be difficult for me as I could lose people I care about. But, as the saying goes, “When one door closes, another one opens.” My second year of college will be a year of remodeling and growth. I will try to be outgoing in a way where I will feel comfortable and happy doing it. I will look at myself in the mirror every day, smile, and remind myself why it’s so important to wake up in the morning and be excited for the day ahead as you will have no idea what it will bring.

If you are just like me and struggling to break that routine, know that it will take time and that’s okay! With a strong support system, an open mind, and an open heart, anything can be possible. Just be willing to reach for that dream to grow for the better.

Olivia Francis is a second-year member of the Her Campus at SBU chapter. She oversees the siteā€™s culture, entertainment, and wellness verticals on the site, including mental health, relationships, TV shows, and movie coverage. Olivia is currently a second-year student majoring in Communications, Social Justice & Advocacy at St. Bonaventure University. Beyond Her Campus, Olivia has been published in many anthropologies over the years through an organization called Young Writers. She is also one of the leading coordinators for SBU's Break The Bubble. In her free time, Olivia enjoys writing poetry and short stories, along with taking walks while listening to her favorite music genres on Spotify such as Pop or R&B. One of her goals is to travel the world someday and explore new foods and customs. An interesting fact about Olivia is she is not only the first college gen student but, she is the first female in her family to go for a higher education.