Amid frantic studying for midterms and spending long nights in the library, we students are given a singular reprieve from our madness. What is this reprieve, you ask? None other than Season 7 of Love is Blind!
Now, I’m no psychoanalyst. I am simply a 21 year-old English major who loves, and has a lot of unwarranted opinions, about reality television. Netflix’s Love is Blind might just be my favorite dating show, and after watching the previous six seasons, I am granting myself the ability to provide commentary on the release of the first six episodes of the new season. Without further ado, here are my (unprofessional) first impressions of the men of Love is Blind Season 7.Â
Garrett:
Garrett seems nice enough as of right now, but I’ll admit that I’m skeptical of him. I mean, have you seen the guy’s smile? I’ve never seen so many teeth in my life! I’m willing to overlook his “uncanny valley” vibe as long as he doesn’t hurt my girl Taylor. With their matching science tattoos, Garrett and Taylor seem perfect for each other. But the preview for the rest of the season definitely put me on edge, and led me to predict that he’s not as perfect as he’s currently made out to be. Â
Also, I’m totally calling him “lower-middle-class Chris Evans” from now on. Thanks for that, Stephen.
Stephen:
Stephen is decidedly the most interesting man in the group so far. Though I was suspicious that he voted for Trump in 2016, he’s turning out to be my favorite contestant (especially because he owned up to that mistake and voted for Biden in the next election). He absolutely makes me laugh the most. I was a tiny bit unsure about whether he and Monica were a good fit for each other, but their coupling somehow works, and Monica seemed to be satisfied with her choice during the acupuncture scene (IYKYK). I’m interested to see how he develops throughout the season, and, after staring at that piano tattoo wrapped around his arm, finding out whether he actually knows how to play the piano.
Also, my roommate was operating under the impression that he was a “magician” instead of an “electrician” for at least a full minute. Love her.Â
Tim:
Honestly, I don’t have much to say about Tim, and I don’t think I truly know enough about him to comment on his role in this series. I’m not that invested in the relationship between him and Alex, mostly because I’m pretty confident it won’t work out. Even after they had that big fight, I still just can’t find it in me to care that much. That’s that!
Tyler:
I’m Tyler’s biggest fan and I’m rooting for him so hard. He and Ashley are perfect for each other, and he better not ruin what they have. The way Tyler just loves Ashley so much truly makes my heart melt. As previously determined, I have been watching Love is Blind for a long time, which means that I know I can’t put my full trust in him after only six episodes. I’m weary of his comment about how some people might tell Ashley that he was “mean,” because that’s basically the equivalent of waving a red flag in her face. I feel like Sabrina Carpenter in her song “Please Please Please”. Don’t embarrass me, Tyler.
Ramses:
Ramses and I would be friends. Or rather, I would want to be friends with him, but he would probably be too cool for me. I love his style, I love his vibe, and I genuinely wonder why he had to resort to a dating show to get married. This guy definitely pulls. I’ve never seen a contestant on this show be as excited about their match as Marissa, and while she may occasionally go overboard with the affection (every time the camera followed them into their bedroom in Cabo I felt like I was interrupting something), who can blame her? Ramses is a catch.
Nick:
Oh, Nicky D. What to say? Unfortunately, I am 100% confident that he and Hannah won’t last. The two have officially been crowned the most ill-fitted couple out of everyone, besides Leo and Brittany. I feel very wishy-washy about Nick and I was not a fan of his in the pods. Since then, I’ve begun to like him slightly more, but that’s probably just because Hannah’s options were between him or Leo. Nobody is capable of making me like Rolex-wearing Leo. I feel bad for Nick because it seems like he does actually like Hannah, when all Hannah has done is write a list of everything she doesn’t like about Nick. Girlboss, but unnecessary.
Yes, Hannah, him riding that duck gave me the ick, too. #solidarity
I won’t comment further on Leo, because I fear I could write a whole essay on that man and the extent to which he is not my cup of tea. If you didn’t make it to Cabo, you’re not making it in this article. Nevertheless, I am looking forward to the rest of this season, as it’s already proving to be an intriguing one.Â