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How To Become Love (When Everyone Sucks)

The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Cal State Chico chapter.

As I’m sure you’ve noticed by now, a lot of people you will meet over the course of college and generally throughout your life; will suck. At a time when growth and positivity should be your only concern, these people will most likely continue to take up more space in your mind than you can afford. So how can you become the best version of yourself, with people who feel like dead weight sitting on your shoulders? You become love. 

What does it mean to become love?

The human condition makes loving people a bit more complicated than it needs to be. It means practicing compassion and striving to offer unconditional love. Yes, unconditional. Even if somebody has done something you disagree with, love means letting go of resentment and recognizing that anger only holds us back from our full potential. Live with intention, lead with love, and always forgive. Forgiveness is a huge part of love because to become it, we must forgive everyone we possibly can to relieve ourselves of the dead weight of resentment. When we impose judgment, we aren’t doing anybody a favor. To each their own. Trust that even the most difficult people to understand are on their own journey, and they are entitled to that. 

Another piece of the puzzle is to stop expecting others to do the same. There’s no point in caring what difficult, unhappy people think about your life. Just let them be wrong. Do not be the person who talks badly about others because they have nothing interesting to say about themselves. Remember to give love unconditionally because you will never reflect on your life wishing you were a meaner person. 

What’s the point when becoming love sounds so unrealistic?

The point is trying; the point is giving as much love into the universe as you wish to receive. You can become love in baby steps. Try and fail and try again, but try. Give out love like you have too much of it. Smile at everyone you make eye contact with, and don’t be annoyed when they don’t smile back because that’s not the point. Let go of those people in your life who sit on your shoulders judging you, and do so nicely, without hate or anger. 

Well, what makes you the expert, Frankie? The answer is that I’m definitely not. There are people in my life that I have a hard time loving, too. I’m taking baby steps towards this because I want to become love. Through many attempts at friendship that simply didn’t work, I’ve learned what NOT to do. I’ve judged people harshly, not considering their journey and value as a whole. I’ve chosen to rid myself of these people rather than to hear them. The reason I’m writing this is because of that. I realized this is how I wanted to live my life going forward on a road trip with my boyfriend last July. Since then, I’ve tried to be better, reading books on becoming love and treating even the most difficult people with kindness. I can already confidently say it has been transformative for my development. So now the ball’s in your court, reader. Do the best you can, and make love your guiding principle. 

Frankie Lasker

Cal State Chico '27