When you start college, you always hear that high school relationships don’t last, especially if you don’t plan on attending the same school.
This is especially true when the relationship is stretched across the country; what if your partner is just a few hours away? How do you navigate that relationship?
My Experience
My partner and I met during our senior year of high school through marching band, and it definitely wasn’t love at first sight. I had the crush first, and I might have pulled some strings to get us together, but that’s a story for another time. We started dating after a month of talking and going on a few dates. We are each other’s first relationship, which I think is pretty cute.
We have seen each other nearly every day since high school; we have been so ingrained in each other’s lives since we started dating. A few months ago, we were going to the same community college and shared the same job. Since we lost those things, we were losing things to talk about.Â
Ever since I moved in June, we have had to make more of an effort to talk, which has been really beneficial.Â
When we hang out now, every Friday per our plan, we aren’t fully consumed in our phones. We want to do things together. We have more date nights, play games together, and have started (multiple unfinished) shows that we watch exclusively with each other.
I have also had to learn to live without him nearby.
I love to be around other people. I usually feel bored being alone, and since moving, I have learned to enjoy my own company. I have found more hobbies for myself and have interests that I can do individually. I have also made some friends that help fill that need to be social.
It has not been perfect, though.Â
On more difficult days, I just want to have him near, but he can’t come over as easily anymore. There is also pressure when we hang out to make every minute matter. On that Friday, we don’t want a minute apart, feeling that we are wasting our time.
So, my unsolicited adolescent advice to couples in a medium-distance relationship is to not look at it in such a negative light; don’t stress. Set up a specific time to be together. My partner and I chose a specific night weekly, but whatever works for your relationship, do it, and stick to that schedule. While you are a medium distance, maybe you want to talk about the future with your partner. Maybe a rough timeline for when you would like to close that gap as a finish line and something to look forward to.
I love my medium-distance relationship, but man, winter break cannot come fast enough.
Love you, J <3