Networking is an inherent challenge for introverts, myself included. Going out to parties and events after hours sounds exhausting after a long day. Indeed, it would be easier to simply snuggle up at home with a good book or show, a cup of tea, and your favourite pet. In the interest of growing a career, however, staying at home every night is not recommended. A Linkedin survey from 2022 found that “85% of jobs are found through networking”. For this reason, networking is essential for career growth and finding jobs.
I was recently introduced to networking through friends of mine. Though my friends are wonderful, encouraging, and supportive, as an introvert, I find networking particularly challenging. I always get nervous that I’ll say the wrong thing, or worry that I am “too much.” Though many guides have already been written on Her Campus on networking, including articles about general networking tips, Linkedin and Career Fairs, and how to network in the film industry, I wanted to offer my insights on things I found to help me successfully network as an introvert. Hopefully, they’ll be helpful to you, too.
1: Focus on a Quality networking Connection (In-Person)
The first thing I notice at networking events is just how busy they are. The room can fill up with overwhelming amounts of sound all to quickly, and I am always darting my head around to follow the many new people and faces. If this sounds like you, I encourage you to focus on quality over quantity: find one person to focus on.
How do you choose and converse with such a person? Choose someone who stood out to you on a panel, asked an interesting question, or who comes right up to you. Once you have such a person, find an interest to connect on, instead of focusing on small talk, and go from your common topic. It could be a question about something the person said in their speech or panel, a common interest, or you could ask general questions about their background — people are always excited to talk about themselves! Just go from there, and always remember that you can exit the conversation at any time. Ideally though, the goal is to make a connection which could go forward in the future, so before bowing out, be sure to ask politely how you can connect: by phone, text, email, Instagram, or LinkedIn. It is most professional nowadays to ask for LinkedIn.
2: Send a Message on LinkedIn (OnLine)
If staying cuddled up in your pajamas is your preferred state (it is certainly mine) — this tip is for you! LinkedIn can be a purely work from home endeavor. There are two options with LinkedIn: connecting with the quality connection you met at your last event, or connecting with people on LinkedIn based on LinkedIn recommendations or searches. From the comfort of your couch, you can write a short, welcoming message to your new connection like this:
Hello [Name],
[Option 1 – Met at an Event]: It was so wonderful to meet you last night at [name of the event]. I really enjoyed your [question, discussion, talk] because [reason].
[Option 2 – Found from a Recommendation or Search]: I am reaching out because I see that you work for [company] OR know [mutual connection]. I am also in this field OR know [mutual connection] through [organization]. Since we seem to share the common interest in [interest]:
[Both] I am just reaching out to connect with you. Please always feel free to send a message, or if you would like, we could connect for a coffee or a Zoom soon. Wishing you a wonderful week!
Best,
[Name]
3: Drinks/Food Table (In-Person)
Food! Drinks! Yum! If you are really not feeling like going up to someone, there is usually always someone near the Drinks or Food Table. In this case, hopefully, a like-minded person is also filling up their coffee or taking sandwiches and will be the first to speak. Once they do, you’re good to go and start a conversation!
In the scenario where someone does not speak immediately at the food or drinks table, try opening with a remark about the food or drink. Something like ‘I also take my coffee black,’ or ‘those sandwiches look good.’ Though this may seem like a lot to say, usually, a friendly person will enthusiastically respond back and steer the conversation from there. As these are crowded areas, you do not have to stay in these conversations too long, and added bonus: you have treats to look forward to afterwards!
4: Compliment Someone (In-Person and Online)
Complimenting someone is a great conversation starter. While this may seem intimidating at first, the benefits of a compliment is that you can keep it down to one sentence. Try complimenting someone on their speech, their question, or their outfit. This will make you appear classy and refined to your new connection. Since you are perceived as someone with a mysterious air of grace, your new connection will usually jump in to say thank you, and continue the conversation accordingly, allowing you the role to sit back and listen. This method is a lot of work up front, but is rewarding in the end.
You can also compliment someone online through a message, especially if they have recently had a big achievement they posted about on LinkedIn. For example, if someone started a new role or degree, or made a post about having recently published a new book, article, or journal article, you can send a message to compliment them on it. A template for this kind of message could be:
Hello [Name],
Congratulations! I saw that you recently started [new role, degree] OR published [name of work]. I am also interested in this [field], and think that it would be wonderful to connect. Can you tell me what inspired you to pursue this endeavor? Look forward to connecting in the future!
Best Wishes,
[Name]
5: Choose events that reflect your interests (Strategy)
I have found that the hardest networking events to go to are ones that do not align with my interests. At these events, I find it is hard to know what topics would be good conversation openers, and who I should approach first, since I am unfamiliar with the field.
For these reasons, I encourage you to choose a networking event that reflects your interests. For example, if you are a reader, choose an event related to books or poetry. If you are interested in politics, go to an event with your local party. If you like dogs, go to a doggy walking event!
Choosing an event which reflects your interests will always help you to have a sense of which topics to discuss, and will hopefully make you feel more comfortable going to and being at the event.
6: Choose The Right Amount of Events to go to (Strategy)
The final part of networking strategy for introverts is choosing the right amount of events to go to. This requires two parts. First, it is important to determine frequency. Would you like to go to networking events once, twice, three times? Then it is important to determine the length of time: is this each week, a month, a year?
For me, I find going to one or two events per month to be enough, otherwise, I get overwhelmed. Knowing this about myself allows me to plan networking events accordingly. I know that I will have to be “on” after work at only two events a month, so each week an event is on, I know to plan self-care, and have a dedicated cozy night in.
7: Recharge at Home
After a long day of networking, rest, relax, and recharge at home — you deserve it!