I rarely thank my lucky stars that I’m a girl. Typically, I’m complaining about some sort of abstract ailment women face or ranting with my friends about the last time we were cat-called for no reason or just lying in bed at night thinking about all the ways my life will be impacted on account of my gender. And, in all fairness, as women, we know there are merits to these worries. We experience them every day.
But for all the struggles we encounter, women also have the unique experience of true community. I often take for granted the hours upon hours of conversation I have with my closest friends. I brush off the comfort of a casual text from my roommate just asking about how I’m doing or if I want something from Sonic. I don’t think twice about holding friends through tears or calling my sorority-little late at night just to chat. There’s something innate in the way we as women lean on one another. It’s special.
I forget how important the little things are. Thankfully, I was recently reminded of how lucky I am to be a girl.
Picture a casual Friday night. Pajamas are on, Pitch Perfect is playing, pumpkin bread is fresh out of the oven, and hot tea is being poured from its pink floral pot. It’s the ideal girls’ night in… with the addition of one of your newly anointed guy friends?
Yeah, yeah, save the sexism. Straight guys can totally, platonically, participate in girls’ night. But it wasn’t until the typical outsider joined our ranks that I was struck with the healing power of this kind of evening.
We talked about our love lives and the stress we were dealing with at school and work, reminisced on some hilarious memories, and doled out advice where we could. Naturally, we chatted through the entirety of Pitch Perfect (minus the performances, we’re not monsters) and by the end of the night, I could tell that our honorary guest felt lighter than he did when he walked in. I sent him home with a loaf of pumpkin bread, and the girls considered it an evening well spent.
That supportive magic is truly unique to us. Men and women fundamentally communicate differently, and there’s no evidence that one form of relationship is inherently better than another, but I’d argue that the phenomenon of a casual girls’ night does more for the soul than we realize.
Moral of the story? Engage in your girls’ nights. Don’t take them for granted. Lean on your friends and your support system in the inherent way only we can. And, on occasion, be willing to extend that superpower to the men in your life, too. They might need it more than you realize.
HCXO,
Colleen