A new year allows us to feel like we get a fresh start. We decide we are going to make a list of changes, often grand goals. Saying that I’ve given up on making resolutions sounds like I’m giving up on hopes of change—but that isn’t the case. I just find that when I set myself up with goals that require intense and rapid change, without realism in mind, I feel that I started failing before I can really succeed.
What issue do we run into with unrealistic resolutions? We know the tale of New Year gym dedication. If I tell myself I’ll go 6 days a week, and I can only manage 4, my resolution already slips away. Or if I can only keep consistent for 3 weeks, I will slowly let myself forget the resolution entirely.
Instead of shooting for perfection, I shoot for realistic consistency. If I already go to the gym 3 times a week, planning to go 4-5 times a week is much more realistic for me. Even having the goal to remain consistent is a big deal. I am a believer in realistic goals that fit into your life because, although we want to throw ourselves in the deep end, sometimes it’s not that easy. It’s the same reason fad diets like juice fasts don’t work. Consistency in your goals is much more impressive because they keep you on track for an extended period of time. I suggest breaking down your goals into smaller, manageable steps to give yourself a starting point.
For the first time in my life, I feel consistent in my goals and accomplishments. Although a crash change may be the push one person needs, it doesn’t mean it is for everyone. It isn’t worth punishing yourself for not succeeding in a mindset that is only fitting for certain types of people.
When you are making your resolutions, you need to keep in mind how ready you are for change. You can set new goals at any point in the year—it isn’t restricted to the new year. Give yourself a realistic goal for now and reevaluate in a month. Celebrate your small wins to build your confidence. You can keep yourself accountable while remaining proud of yourself. It helps you stay motivated in the long run.
Real change is steady. It is not rapid. That bothers us because we are impatient in nature at times. All the work you put in is time you dedicate to yourself. Working on consistency in goals is essential time dedicated to the support of your future self. If you are envisioning a specific version of you, you can still want that and achieve it. However, you can’t get there without giving yourself time and a real path to your destination.
We want to succeed. We want to be an inspiration to ourselves. Give yourself the opportunity to do so. Success may not be linear; it may not be picture perfect. But it is for you, so do it for you. Plan with your own health in mind. Healing one piece of yourself should not be at the sacrifice of a different piece. New Year’s resolutions can help you achieve change within your life, especially if you make them realistic for your vision. I have given myself grace to be consistent with simpler goals, and I feel more improved than ever before. You are allowed to give yourself time to change. Change is a day-by-day, moment-to-moment project that is for you.