When you’ve been friends with someone for a long time, it is hard to let those friendships go. Whether it’s the longevity you’re holding on to, the history you’ve shared, or the jokes and secret language, it all hurts. Sometimes it’s hard to address the why, because holding on to something is easier than a confrontation that could hurt someone you love. However, It’s always better to be honest about your feelings instead of beating around the bush because it’ll not only hurt the other person but will be draining for you as well. Then, you’ll still wonder what went wrong after the countless wild evenings, Netflix sessions, the crushes, the memories but you’ll also want to know how to identify it, and here’s how:
1. You don’t feel like making plans with them If you’re coming up with excuses to not meet up with them every time, they try making a plan and are not feeling guilty about it either, chances are you’re not simply lazy or swamped in schoolwork. You’ve subconsciously moved on from the friendship- and that is okay!
2.They don’t celebrate your successes. Everyone deserves to feel appreciated and loved for their hard work from time to time but if your friend does not even pretend to be happy for you or reiterates their successes then it’s time to reevaluate your friendship because you deserve to surround yourself with people who make you feel valued.
3. You’ve made new friends Chances are you’ve moved to a new city or go to a different university and you are bound to meet new people that look at things from a different perspective and form friendships with them. Slowly the comparison may creep in and you wish that your friend were more like them, but you cannot expect them to change. The best thing to do is accept the fact that you’ve outgrown them.
But at the end of the day, what’s important to understand is, that it may not be their fault or yours. Humans are mercurial beings, and we change our minds all the time, we outgrow things, places, and people because we crave newness and that is okay because it is a part of life and there is a time for every moment, every memory, and every friendship.