At the start of quarantine, I did what every bored and single young adult would do when they have no choice but to remain at home: I downloaded a dating app.
I’ll be honest, this isn’t my first rodeo when it comes to using a dating app. I downloaded Tinder for the sole fact that everyone else I knew was using it, but I ended up deleting it before the fall semester of my first year in college.
Considering I had already used Tinder before, I wanted a fresh new take. I ended up downloading Hinge because of how it allowed you to like and comment on someone’s profile, just like how you would on Instagram. The app also allowed you to answer prompt questions to help you start a conversation with a possible match. As a self-proclaimed “Social Justice Warrior,” I chose the prompt asking about a social cause that I care about.
I chose the Black Lives Matter Movement due to the fact that I was attending protests and signing petitions, and I wanted to make it known to my possible “matches” that this was something I truly care about.
If someone liked or commented on my social cause prompt, I would start the conversation by asking them if they donated to the George Floyd Fund (which was what I had written as my response for the prompt). A few people responded honestly and others simply ghosted after that. There were some people I matched with that were true activists, but there was no connection or chemistry, so it led nowhere.
However, there were two main people that I made some form of “connection” with. One ghosted me, but the other I ended up ghosting because of one main reason: he didn’t believe in politics.
Sure, he was cute and funny and could actually carry a conversation, but he didn’t care about the Black Lives Matter movement (or any other movement, at that).
For someone to say that they’re just “not into politics” is for them to say, “it’s not affecting me, so why should I care?” That’s when I start seeing red flags.
As to why, well, I’ll put it this way:
I’m a queer Mexican-American woman. I do not have the same privilege as a straight white man. I cannot go out at night without fearing for my life. I can’t go to work without someone assuming I’m an immigrant. For you to not care about the laws and policies within our country is for you to not care about the people you claim to love. Because even if it’s not affecting you, it could be affecting them.
At the same time, who you match with is up to you. No one should tell you who is right or wrong for you in the same way that no one should tell you who to vote for. This is America after all, and even if some of us may not like it, we do have the free will to do as we please. And with my free will, I refuse to be with someone who doesn’t believe in politics, because that’s something that I truly care about and if they cared about me, they would too.