I know we’ve all had experiences that have weighed heavy on our hearts. Maybe it was the passing of a loved one, someone that you had placed your trust in betrayed and wronged you, you have things in your past that you wish you could change — whatever it may be, there’s a way to move past it. Whether you’ve carried this burden with you for years or days, we all have some skeletons in the closet. But it might be time to let them out and stop letting them weigh us down.
There are plenty of do’s and don’ts.
For instance, don’t ignore your heavy feelings or pretend that you don’t feel them. Allowing yourself time to feel everything and grieve will make moving past things much easier. Additionally, it’s beneficial to transform your negative thoughts into a positive outlook. For instance, instead of thinking about how you can’t believe that something so negative could happen to you, think about how fortunate you are to be able to find a new direction, one that may be even better for you.
Trying to remove yourself from a situation may be the easiest way to prevent the memory or thoughts from being in the forefront of your mind. This may be as simple as blocking or unfriending an individual that may have hurt you or avoiding a place where you have previously experienced some sort of trauma.
Be kind to yourself.
It’s easy to become discouraged and feel that you deserved whatever may have happened to you, but know that you are never deserving of whatever trauma you experienced in your past. It was not your fault. Bad things can happen to good people. You are not responsible for how others treated and/or hurt you. Now it’s time to focus on the present and moving forward. That’s easier said than done, of course.
More often than not, we don’t receive the answers that we want or need. Instead, we may just hurt ourselves even more by expecting a resolution where there may never be one. People will not always be quick to apologize (if they ever even do). Take your healing into your own hands. Your happiness should not be reliant on other people or their apologies.
Fill your circle with those you love.
Just because one person wronged or hurt you does not mean that you are unworthy of love. You are still surrounded by people who adore and love you and those are the types of people that you need to be around. They are also going to be a very good outlet. Find people who you can trust, and once you’re ready, they can be a shoulder to cry on or someone to listen.
Most importantly, allow forgiveness to enter into your heart. At the end of the day, the one hurting the most will be the one who is unable to forgive and move on. Don’t hold onto the things that make your heart weigh heavy. Allowing yourself to forgive will finally help you release all the anger, guilt, sadness or shame that you have been harboring within yourself.