What You Learn From Completing A Male Purge

A month ago, I wrote an article about the process of purging men, and how to prepare for a prolonged absence. I wasn’t confident that I could do it, and wasn’t sure I was going to even attempt it. But I found a copy of E. Jean Carroll’s book, and thought I might as well try my best. Two weeks later, I felt like a new person. A new person chocked full of unexpected experiences from the process that I’d love to share with you!

People Have Weird-ish Reactions to It

When you tell people you’re going on a male purge, they will mostly look at you like you’ve grown another head, or just start laughing. I had many friends tell me there was no way I could accomplish two whole weeks without men. And I got the pleasure of proving them wrong just 14 days later. But it made me a better person, so there wasn’t nearly enough gloating. 

You Bottle Up A Lot of Feelings During

One of the first things that happens during the process is that you remember all these messages you could have relayed to men in your life. You think of conversations you wanted to have, or questions you have to ask, but there really isn’t an outlet for it. You might try to remember to bring it up in a few weeks, but it mostly gets pushed aside for more important matters. 

Men Really Get Knocked off their Pedestal

If you think men are really amazing, taking a break from them will challenge that belief. There is a whole world out there with amazing people and experiences without including the y chromosome. You have to give yourself the opportunity to see what is out there for yourself. 

It’s A Good Time To Revisit What Makes You Happy

What are your hobbies? What do you do for fun, to fill time by yourself? If you haven’t had a ton of time on your own recently, it’s a little hard to answer those questions. This is an excellent time to get to know yourself. Are you really bad at math, or do you have a hard time focusing long enough to solve complex equations? It’s time to figure out these mysteries! Therapy: recommended. 

You Learn to Live With Less Attention

I’ve been told that I have an “attention seeking” personality. Which is just one of the reasons people told me that I wouldn’t make it the full two weeks. It’s a little weird at first, cutting yourself off from the people you’re constantly speaking to and getting attention from, but you adjust. And you adjust for the better. Attention isn’t worth it if it’s toxic.

It’s Really Not As Hard As You Imagined

In the first few days I would be dissapointed in myself for not immediately changing songs when Thomas Rhett or Matt Stell would come on. But as the days wore on, it became much easier to stay true to the mission. You can truly accomplish anything with the right mindset and dedication. 

The Transition Back Can Be Challenging

I was very hesitant to end my male purge, I very much wanted to extend it a least another week. But classes were starting and all my professors are male. With the purge now ended, I’ve realized just how difficult it is to communicate with men on a daily basis. There is so much translation, mediation, and emotional labor that goes into those conversations. It’s no wonder there was a lot of peace in the weeks before. 

You Love Yourself More After

I used to think that my happiness had a direct correlation with how people viewed me. I spent so much time making and remaking myself to be someone that could be liked. But it truly starts with liking and then loving yourself. 

I didn’t think I would be able to manage two full weeks without men or male influence in my life, but I did it! I came out the other side with renewed happiness, and even missed it when it was all over. And I have full confidence that you can do it too!

• empowerment
• feelings
• men
• purge