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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Kutztown chapter.

All my life I have never been the type of person to have a boyfriend, or even a prospective person lined up. This has mainly been met with my family constantly asking if I’ve met anyone and my friends trying to make me feel better by saying, “Don’t worry. You’ll find someone.” They don’t realize that I’m not upset or bothered by it; I’m living life at my own pace. 

It’s scary sometimes when you see other people who are worried that they’re going to be alone and end up staying that way forever. I remember one time my friend didn’t want to break up with her boyfriend just because she didn’t want to be single. It’s such an unhealthy mentality to have, and you’re not creating a good relationship with yourself. Settling for someone who isn’t making you happy or isn’t treating you right just because you don’t want to be single is not the path you want to start down. 

I used to always be worried that I would never end up with someone, especially when I spent the majority of high school without a partner, but looking back, it’s such a strange thing to have been worried about at such a young age. I won’t lie sometimes the thought still crosses my mind, but I just have to remind myself that it’s okay, I’m okay. I’m comfortable enough with myself that I don’t need someone there to reassure me, at least not in a romantic sense. I have other people in my life that offer love and support, and sometimes that’s all you need. 

You shouldn’t be in a relationship for the sole reason that you’re worried about not being able to find someone else. Everyone is different and working at their own pace. It’s not a rush or a race. Some people are able to find a partner that they can easily connect with and some don’t. Both are totally okay. It’s not about what others might think of you or what’s going on with everyone else; it’s your life. Take the time to be with yourself, learn about what’s changing with you, especially your wants and needs. Building this relationship with yourself can only bring positive results in the future. 

You shouldn’t be worried because you don’t have a significant other or haven’t had a romantic partner in a while. Everything will work out in the end, and you will find your person if that’s what you want out of life. And if not, that’s okay, too. As long as you’re happy with yourself, that’s what matters most. 

 

Jessica Garrison is a professional writing major and women's, gender, and sexuality studies minor at Kutztown University.