For years I’ve struggled with giving myself love and a positive attitude. This time last year, I thought that self-love meant you were narcissistic or self-absorbed. But that is most definitelyĀ notĀ the case.
Self-love is about recognizing your uniqueness, that there is no other person in the world like you. The most important relationship you can form in your life is not with those who surround you, but with yourself. Recognizing your worth and the closeness you should have to yourself, mentally and emotionally, is the first step to starting a healthy relationship with yourself.
After this recognition, find what’s best for you, especially if you’re willing to try something new. If you take self-care one step at a time and make it part of your daily routine, then it will seem so ritualistic that you will appreciate the time you take to devote to yourself.
Something I’ve simply added to my schedule is affirmations. I take five minutes in the morning and five minutes before lacrosse practice to write down what I will accomplish that day. Simply devoting ten minutes of free time has allowed me to create achievable goals that keep me in a positive headspace. It may seem cheesy, but when you write something down, it will come true.
The positive goes hand in hand with the negative. Finding an outlet for your stress or negative energy helps it escape your body. For some people, this may be repeating a mantra or meditating. I find it helpful to participate in a physical activity like lacrosse or kickboxing so that I can devote a specific time to have negativity or aggression and have my workout help it escape me.
Outside of this time, I do not dwell on what I could have done better or what is still bugging me. Instead, I take a deep breath and know that I am able to walk away from the negative space that I just put my energy into. It’s always important to remember to leave your negativity behind and walk forward towards the positivity.
At the end of the day, I take the time to unwind in various ways: doing a face mask, watching a show on Netflix, or having a glass of wine. Switching up the ways I allow myself to unwind makes it more enjoyable through the shuffle of things I enjoy instead of feeling stagnant and becoming bored with the same thing. Making sure to have time to relax at the end of the day also allows reflection on what happened that day and helps create improve your mindset of what can be done tomorrow to make things better.
Practicing self-love can be challenging for many of us, especially with the stigma that surrounds it. It’s not about being selfish – and no one should ever feel so when devoting time to themselves. Instead, it’s about getting in touch with ourselves, appreciating who we are, our happiness, and our well-being. By practicing self-love, we are able to push through our own limits and achieve new heights so that we can shine in the eyes of others, but most importantly, in the eyes of ourselves.