This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Bentley chapter.
* Please note this is meant to be satirical. Professors (especially Bentley professors!) are fantastic, and we all greatly appreciate them!
What they say: “Make sure you look over the material for Wednesday’s class.”
What they mean: “Read in detail every single page of the 60 pages I assigned for Wednesday and take extensive notes because I will be randomly calling on you in class and this will count toward your participation grade.”
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What they say: “We’re going to have a few short papers this semester.”
What they mean: “60% of your grade is based on three ten page papers that I will scribble red pen all over. These papers will be about boring topics that none of us really care about.”
What they say: “Please come visit my office hours!”
What they mean: “I will occasionally drop by my office so good luck catching me there. No, I will not help you write your paper. No, I do not have an hour to spend explaining to you why double integrals are important. No, I am not going to add back points for that test question you clearly got right that I marked wrong. Please don’t bother me in my office hours; I will be busy either taking a nap or gossiping with other professors.”
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What they say: “Good effort.”
What they mean: “That sucked.”
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What they say: “No cell phones in class.”
What they mean: “I will likely look the other way and pretend not to notice if you use your cell phone under the table. If I’m in a bad mood I will call you out for using it.”
What they say: “If you have any questions…”
What they mean: “You shouldn’t have any questions because I’m going to do a great job explaining everything. If you really don’t understand something, raise your hand and I’ll answer it for you by going off on random tangents about irrelevant topics.”
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What they say: “You made some good points.”
What they mean: “I don’t agree with anything you said.”
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