In the light of the recent military movement, I’ve had a few people ask me for my opinion but what they seemed more interested in was my emotional position, not my political standing. So, all politics aside, this is what it’s like to be the forgotten members of the military. Military personnel choose the sacrificial military life, their spouses choose it when they marry into the military, but their children are born into it. We live without homes, without roots, without extended family, and often without at least one parent for extended periods of time.
I have always been proud of my family’s long standing history of military service. My father’s service provided me with a unique upbringing that allowed me to explore the world from a young age. I am proud to be an Army Brat but it isn’t always easy. As my father reaches retirement age, the thought of him deploying still haunts and worries me. The last time he was deployed was a pivotal moment in my life and essentially was the beginning of the end of my childhood years. I have written poetry for years (though I rarely share it). It calms me in times of worry and panic. When my father was deployed to Iraq years ago, I wrote the following:
Hope Again
“I awoke to the morning rays and the tune of a single cardinal. And as I peered out of the frozen window I was dazzled by temporary jewels of clear white. Most would call this peaceful, charming maybe. Although all was tranquil in sight and sound, all was wrecked inside my heart. No hint of bacon sizzling on my Daddy’s skillet or the sound of my Daddy trying to pry my brother from his soundless sleep. And I won’t for months to come. My Daddy’s far away in Iraq and that causes pain in my heart. Why must our world have to be unperfected? Why must war, hunger, and disease exist? My life is covered in a thick mist. But there’s one thing that gives me joy. Every morning as I think I remember that I’m a strong-hearted girl and I’m proud that my Daddy’s in Iraq, and I’m proud to be in a military family, and most of all I’m proud to be American cause I know that I’m free. And that is what gives me hope again.”
Okay it’s a little tacky but it’s still true. I know now, as I knew when I was a kid, that even though it’s miserable to wake up every morning with someone seemingly missing from my life, I know that what he is doing is important for something bigger and greater than me, our family, or even himself. The pain, sense of abandonment, and feeling of loss is constant but the pride of country and for my father softens the emotional blows that deployment brings about. It’s emotionally trying and often frustrating but, all politics aside, my father has given the past two and a half decades serving our nation and I couldn’t be prouder of him or the morals he represents.