I came across this post on Facebook recently that was geared towards women, and asked the question: “At what age did you realize men were viewing you in a sexual light?” The post had an image of a bar graph with results of a poll that was taken. Surprisingly, the age group with the highest numbers were from 9-11. That shocked me so I went to read the comments and got even more shocked when I saw some women stating ages as young as 3 and 4. This made me think about when I came to this very same realization, and I realized I was about 9 or 10 when it hit me that men were viewing me in a sexual way.
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Three, four, …nine or ten?!
These ages hit my mind and I was so shocked. I grasped that so many women lose their innocence at a young age, because perverted human beings can’t let a child be a child. In my past, I clearly remember this guy in my neighborhood, at least 40, making advances at me. He would say how I was beautiful and one day I would be his wife. He would even go so far as to walk me to my bus stop sometimes, all the while checking out my under developed 10 year old body. Though it made me uncomfortable, to the point I would walk the long way from my bus stop to my home just to avoid his house, I never grasped the full extent of how wrong this was. Now being older, I fully understand my mother’s reaction when I told her. I now get why she started back walking me to my bus stop every morning. She, like many other parents in the world, just wanted her little girl to be protected from the lust of depraved men.
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Sexualization is not ok. It needs to end!
Little girls should not be sexualized. They should be able to live out their childhood and play until their hearts are content. What they wear should not be viewed with a sexual eye and what they do should not be seen as sexy. A little girl should never be made uncomfortable about herself or fear men or boys coming on to her. I remember growing up and wanting to wear baggy clothing just so comments would not be made about my body from male peers or older men. This is not something a girl should even be aware of. Even as a woman, I still see these same issues arise with me as well as with my friends. We could be covered from head to toe and men still make obscene gestures and sounds or say sexual things to us. Once again, it’s not right!
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No, no, no. Women, do not blame yourselves!
Due to men not being able to supress these urges, women get penalized. We grow up being taught to not “provoke” men by how we dress, move, or talk. We are told to be “ladies” and ladies aren’t provactive and they cover up. We are taught that boys will be boys and women can’t do the same thing as men. We can’t dance sexy, dress sexy, or embrace our sexuality at all. It is ingrained in us that we are the reasons men act the way they do. I’m here to call bs on all of this. Women are sexualized as kids, in sweats, or even when we are making a clear effort to not be. This shows that the problem does not lie with women, but with men and their lack of control.
So do not supress yourself for the benefit of a man. Be careful of course, because we do live in a world where men feel enititled to our bodies and society blames us for this. Yet, still be you. Protect young girls and your fellow women, but embrace every facet of your womanhood. It is not, nor will ever be, a curse.