This year, I experienced my first Valentine’s Day as someone with a significant other. I figured I should let the world know about this much-lauded experience since we (and corporations) make such a big deal out of it. (I should mention that my partner lives in the States and I wasn’t able to be with them on actual Valentine’s Day and we exchanged gifts the weekend prior.)
I have to say in all honesty that apart from texting “Happy Valentine’s Day! *heart emojis*” to my partner, I barely noticed that it was Valentine’s Day. It was more or less a normal day (except that I kept getting confused about what day of the week it was since Monday, the day before, had been a holiday). I actually did not eat any chocolate either, surprisingly enough (I could have done with that part being different).
I always heard a lot growing up about the pressures of Valentine’s Day, how people (usually heterosexual men) had to enact some grand gestures of love so that their partner would not feel let down or disappointed. While it always seemed to me that relationships with such dynamics could perhaps benefit from a bit more communication around expectations, wants, and needs, I also never really got why Valentine’s Day was such a big deal. Sure, it’s a nice concept. I like chocolate. I like little presents. Cards are good. I like expressing my love, both romantic and platonic, to the people in my life, and I like having it expressed back. But honestly that was enough for me. I didn’t feel the need for grand gestures fraught with anxiety-ridden expectations. I have papers to write, for goodness’ sakes!
I enjoy the expressing love part of Valentine’s Day, and the eating chocolates part, but I also enjoy a tongue-in-cheek look at some historical facts associated with this day. For instance, I found out that in addition to being the patron saint of love, St. Valentine is the patron saint of the plague, which seems quite fitting to me since so many of us are currently ill (though hopefully not with the plague. If you suspect you have contracted plague please quarantine yourself immediately.). He is also the patron saint of not fainting, (no, I did not make that up) a fact that will hopefully offer inspiration and strength to us all when we see our midterm grades.