You’ve watched Hocus Pocus ten times, carved a pumpkin (or at least tried to), and traded your contour creams for fake blood. Now you’re ready for the main event: the Halloween party.
It’s not a typical house party. Fancy dress changes people (as Cinderella Story fans will know) and you’re definitely going to meet some strange characters.
But fear not! This guide will prepare you for the weird and wonderful people who are going to make your night…
1. Vomiting Cat
You get to the party at 8.30, just in time to see a girl dressed in a black dress and cat ears stumbling out of the toilet, wiping vomit off her chin. Thus marks the arrival of The Drunk Cat, the spectacularly smashed girl who’s been predrinking since 5pm.
2. Controversial Politics Student
She’s wearing so much eyeshadow that she looks like the Emperor from Star Wars but she is, in fact, Theresa May. Not only does she look like the PM, but she’s getting into character and can be heard telling the guy dressed as Putin “We need to put the British people first”. You have to admire her commitment to the cause.
3. White T-Shirt Guy on the Pull
He’s wearing a white T-Shirt and telling people he’s a “ghost”. Even though he’s made 0/10 effort on his appearance, he is at least getting into character – he can be seen hovering in the corner of the room, making eyes at the Harley Quinn on the sofa.
4. Victoria’s Secret Model
For those who can’t wait until SSB, Halloween is the perfect opportunity to get into your undies and strut around like you’re Gigi Hadid. This girl is wearing a gorgeous black silk corset set, with a tiny line of fake blood on her lip (because she’s clearly a dead bat) You have to love her self-confidence, plus she looks hot!
5. Lad Pack
You know the saying: guys who dress up as the Spice Girls together, stay together. They arrive in a big group and are glued to each other all night, because otherwise their outfit won’t make sense. It’s brilliant to see a bunch of guys laughing at themselves and, besides, it’s refreshing to see a uniform that’s not a blue shirt and chinos…
6. Killer Clown
He’s really gone OTT with his outfit. Not only has he plastered his face with paint, but he’s wearing white contact lenses that make him look like Victor Krum when he goes blind in that maze. As if looking at him wasn’t scary enough, he’s also finding it hilarious to jump out at people from behind doors. He is to be avoided at all costs.
7. Girl with #NoQualms
She’s covered herself head to toe in red bodypaint, made a tail out of milk bottles and is using Diet Coke cans as devil horns. People either want to have pictures with her or they’re avoiding eye-contact like she’s a fellow patient in the Walk-in Centre waiting room. The host spends a lot of the evening trying to make sure she doesn’t get red paint on the wall, but the girl is too busy chirpsing the overly-fake-tanned Donald Trump to notice.
Halloween is the perfect time to reinvent yourself for one night only – it’s like a 24 hour gap yah. So get your pumpkin juice ready (Vodka works, too) and prepare for a night your friends will never let you forget.