We’ve all been there – you’re stranded in Fratland desperately craving a slice from Canyon, it is 20 degrees outside, and you just cannot find your fracket. Whether you forgot where you hid it, or some horrible person stole it, you’re desperate and will go to any lengths not to freeze on your walk home. Next time this happens to you, don’t panic, we’ve got you covered. Here are seven items that can be your fracket for the night.
*Disclaimer: We in no way condone stealing these items from fraternities. We do, however, suggest making friends with people who live in fraternities and will gladly let you borrow these items for your walk home.
1. A curtain
There might be some nasty frat sludge splashed onto the bottom of it, but it will definitely serve its purpose.
2. A towel
Borrowing a towel from a fraternity brother’s room or bathroom might not be the most sanitary of options, but sometimes, a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do.
3. A tablecloth
This option may be a little more difficult to come by, as we are not sure if frats even own tablecloths. But if you search hard enough, a tablecloth could be a game changer.
4. A blanket
Whether it comes from the furniture that’s stuffed into a side room or straight from the dog bed, at least you’ll be warm on your walk home.
5. A trash bag
A trash bag is probably not the most ideal substitution for a fracket, but if it covers your arms and legs, it’s definitely better than nothing!
Bonus: it’s waterproof!
6. A shower curtain
Thinking about what goes on in a frat shower, and how they’re most likely not being cleaned as often as they should, makes this one a pretty tough decision. But you know what they say… desperate times calls for desperate frackets.
7. “Borrowing”
Even though you’ll just be putting someone else in the same, desperate position you were just in, most people agree that if your fracket gets stolen, it’s fair game to “borrow” someone else’s.
Happy fratting, Penn Staters! Keep warm and keep track of that fracket!
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