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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Chapman chapter.

When I saw Modern Romance on my required reading list for one of my classes I became intrigued. Would this book finally help me find a boyfriend? Would I become a master at all dating rules? WELL I am still single but I would like to say I have learned quite a lot when it comes to dating thanks to my man Aziz. I highly recommend this book so I highlighted some interesting questions that he answers. 

How long should I wait to answer his text?

Ansari learned 32% of people under the age of 30 rely on texting when they are talking to a potential partner. He also mentions Reward Uncertainty, and how when you are waiting for a text, it seems more rewarding when you finally get it. So basically it’s better to wait a little longer to reply so the person you are texting is more excited when they read it. Some people double the time it took for the message to be sent, to make it seem like you are busy and the text back is casual. Others thought that waiting only a couple minutes is better for the conversation but still makes the person seem like you aren’t too desperate.

 

Does online dating really work?

YES. Since 2012, 1/3 of all married couples met online, showing that it’s becoming the new normal. Ansari sights a lot of positive things about online dating. It can save people from those awkward first dates when you are stuck talking to someone you have nothing in common with. It also lets you meet many people from the comfort of your bed!

How did dating work before texting?

Dating was mostly initiated over phone call. Which many still prefer. People found the phone call method to be more direct and you could actually tell if someone really wanted to see you based on the tones through a phone call. There was also less back and forth and people were less inclined to cancel. For people over the age of 30, most of them still initiate first dates over the phone because that’s the only way they know.

What is the deal with Tinder?

Many people initially downloaded Tinder for the “game” aspect of it but found themselves meeting people they actually liked. Tinder can be used for short term (simple hookup) and long term (dating) potential. There is still a negative stigma with Tinder and many people, especially women, say they would be embarrassed to admit they met their future boyfriend on Tinder. BUT Tinder is still popular, especially on college campuses, so swipe away!

How has marriage changed since the 1960s?

76 percent of women, SEVENTY SIX PERCENT, stated that they were willing to marry men that they didn’t love. They did this because back then the only way to move out of your parent’s house was to get married and move in with your husband. It wasn’t acceptable to live with your girlfriends in the city and get drinks every night. You were supposed to be a family woman. This explains why women got married at a younger age, because getting married was their ticket out of the house. Now a days, women are way pickier because they can live a glamorous life as a single lady until they find their perfect match.Â