An Argument for Caples

When I was a first year, I heard a lot of people hate on Caples. They said the walk to Peirce takes forever, the seventh floor is haunted, there are too many people crammed into one building so the noise is terrible, and the aquatic mural in the elevator (now painted over ed: RIP aquatic mural) was creepy with the only alternative being to walk up too many flights of stairs. Kenyon students have serious dorm loyalty and a lot of people seem to think of Caples is at the bottom of the barrel. When housing lottery rolled around my freshman year and my lottery number was twenty people away from being last, I resigned myself to living in the dreaded Caples. But it turns out I had nothing to worry about.

The infamous elevator, pictured above: Everyone was devastated when the creepy aquatic mural disappeared from the elevator at the beginning of last semester. Even if it was creepy, it was unique and part of Kenyon life. Even though I didn’t live in the building when the elevator was painted, I felt robbed of that Caples specific experience I thought I would get to have. Aside from this fuss, the elevator is a great way to get exposure to people you’ve never met before. Just last week I was squished together with a few guys talking about how many orgasms they could have in a row. Classy.

Separation between school and home: All my friends that live South can’t seem to walk to Caples without some sort of complaint about how far it is, if they even make the journey at all. But when you walk this distance everyday it really doesn’t feel that long. It’s good exercise and an excuse, whether or not you want one, to be outside a little longer than normal. It can be really comforting to be able to leave all the stress of the academic day behind you while trudging home through the snow.

The noise: I think this maybe the only serious drawback. I live on a floor between a suite of soccer players below and a suite of basketball players above. Wednesday night can get pretty rowdy. But people tend to be pretty respectful of quiet hours, at least during the week, and promptly turn down the jams at midnight. Plus, my roommate and I feel a kind of camaraderie with the boys upstairs after listening to them drunkenly sing the Canadian national anthem. 

Air conditioning: Caples was big step up from my living arrangements in Gund last where it was so hot people would sleep in the Gund lounge, the only place that was air-conditioned in the freshman quad. But in Caples, each room has its own thermostat so you can keep your living space as cool as you want it in August and as warm and toasty as you like in February.

Showers: Personally, I love the Caples showers. There’s the options of a tub or a regular shower, which actually has a door instead of curtains. And the water is almost always hot.

The tallest building in Knox County: These are some pretty impressive bragging rights, so astound your friends and families back home. They won’t know the difference. Also, because the building is so tall, those of us who live on the higher floors are privileged with fantastic views. The view from my window in particular looks out into the braches of a tree so I can pretend that I’m living in a treehouse. I can’t count the number of times I’ve woken up to a vibrant sunrise splashed outside my window.

Friends: Another major perk of Caples are the suites. You can live with a bunch of our friends all next to you, and have your own lounge to hang out in. Even if you’re not lucky enough to secure a suite of your own, Caples houses so many people that you’re bound to have some friends somewhere else in the building, if not on several floors.

I could go on about having laundry in your own building, or a mural of Where the Wild Things Are painted on the wall of your floor, but I think you get the idea. Caples has its own advantages and disadvantages, just like any other building, and it is by no means an undesirable place to live. Kenyon students tend to be to be loyal to their dorms because each building offers its own quirks. Caples simply gets a bad rap because it is one of the quirkiest of them all. 

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