Let’s face it, relationships are a part of life whether you want them to be or not. People fall in and out of love all the time. Relationships teach us about ourselves and what we find to be morally right or wrong. They can start as early as middle school or as late as college, but even if we think we have experience in what love is, that doesn’t always keep us from occasionally making the biggest mistakes of our lives.
People are forgetting that relationships aren’t a contest of who’s better than the other or a competition over how well we can keep up with the other’s habits. Yet, little by little, some of us are letting our partners win. And what could I be possibly be talking about you may ask? It’s simple–drugs.
Drugs and intimate relationships are not a good mix. Having a partner who abuses alcohol and other drugs is very much a domino effect. They influence everything and everyone around them. Will me smoking marijuana keep them around? Sure they won’t want to break up with me now. Maybe if I can keep up with his drinking he’ll realize how much I’m willing to work for this. Sorry ladies and gents, but relationships just don’t work that way. From seeing it in the tabloids to experiencing it with your bffs, it’s happening all the time. Some of us just don’t remember that hard effort, and sometimes disappointment, comes with a relationship. And especially now, being college students and all, it seems as though we may be more prone to be involved with someone abusing drugs.
Yes you say you love him and he says he loves you too, but to what extent do they actually mean it? Do they mean it enough to stop you from doing things you’re completely against just because you want them to like you? What about your health, do they care about that? Do they think it’s “sexy” to see you smoke or come home wasted every weekend? Are they ever willing to put you first, before a drink with their friends or a smoke here and there? Relationships with drug abuse are bound to be dysfunctional. There is an illusion of choice for the abuser. Do I want the girl/ boy or the cocaine? But in truth, they aren’t choosing anything because they already know what they want. The only relationship that truly matters to them is the one with their drug. The more they drink, the more time is taken away from actually being a couple. The fighting starts to increase and sooner than later you are faced with even more problems that could include something even as serious as partner violence. You, and only you, have the power to choose for what is right for you. Drugs don’t help a relationship, especially if both of you are doing it. Hell, it won’t even work when one person is doing it because when it comes down do it, it’s likely to bother the other person.
The point of the matter is that it’s ok to say no, even to that special someone. Don’t give in to drugs just because you can’t stand to be without someone. Drugs aren’t the answer to a happy and healthy relationship.