Long distance relationships are hard, to say the least. But, if you and your significant other are anything like me and my boyfriend, you know that the challenges you face now will all be worth it in the end when you’re finally together for good. Here are some tips that I’ve followed to help keep my own relationship strong, even through the distance.
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1. Communicate. This is so important for relationships in general, but it becomes especially significant in a long distance relationship. You aren’t there with your partner to see his/her facial expressions when he/she talks. You aren’t there to see and understand what he/she is going through. All you have to rely on is what he/she says to you, and all he/she has to rely on is what you say to him/her. A couple of times I thought I was having a fight with my boyfriend (over text) when it turned out that we had just completely misunderstood each other. In fact, these were the only times we ever came close to fighting. But, once we made sure to communicate clearly to each other what we were feeling, any hard feelings immediately dissolved.
2. Remember that you both need space. I don’t mean you have to “take a break” from the relationship; I mean that sometimes you will have opportunities to spend time with friends and have some fun on your own. This will sometimes mean that you will have to slow down on your texting for a couple of hours. It took me some time to figure out that this wasn’t a terrible thing to do to my boyfriend. It’s crucial to make new friends in college and the need to text your long distance significant other shouldn’t stop you from doing that. Don’t forget that your other half needs to have a life of his/her own as well. If you don’t want him/her to be upset when you hang out with friends, you shouldn’t get upset when he/she does the same.
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3. Trust. Again, this is important in any relationship, but obviously becomes so much more so in a long distance relationship. Since you aren’t physically there with the person, it’s easy to get jealous over tiny things. In a way, I’m a little jealous of anyone who gets to see my boyfriend every day, but I trust him completely. If you don’t trust your significant other while you aren’t around, then a long distance relationship is probably not for you. To make it work, there’s a need for both people to trust and respect each other 100 percent. I would never, ever take advantage of my boyfriend’s trust, and I know he would never do that to me.
I can’t guarantee that this advice will cure any and all relationship problems. However, I can say that following these guidelines has helped me to keep a healthy, strong relationship with my boyfriend, even though we’re separated by 150 miles. Whether you’re thinking about starting an LDR, already in one, or you’re in a “no-distance” relationship (lucky!), I hope these tips provided some help and I wish you the best of luck in reaching your happily ever after!