As you enjoy spending your summer months relaxing by the pool instead of spending 24/7 studying, you can’t help but daydream about that summer fling you’ve watched countless movies about. No matter how many beaches you go to or how many times you walk up and down the boardwalk, that special someone seems to be nowhere in sight. Frustration starts to build up as you wonder why on earth the cute lifeguard doesn’t even look your way, even though you’re rocking your cutest cheeky bottoms. Alas, I give you Tinder: an app that provides you with an endless selection of boys in a certain age group and mile radius that you select yourself.
How does Tinder work, you ask? You simply download the app and sign in using Facebook (but don’t worry, your 1,000 Facebook friends won’t see), select a few pictures where you’re looking your best, pick a witty bio, and off you go. Your homepage becomes flooded with boys who have also picked their best pictures (or at least they think they did… mirror selfies? No thanks!). Your options are to either ‘like’ someone, indicated by a green heart or swiping right, or ‘nexting’ them by hitting the red x or swiping left. Here is the beauty of the app: they will never know if you said yes or no to them unless you both like each other and voila: it’s a match!
What’s the next step? A chat option is available in which you can either message your match or wait for him to message you. Sounds fun, right? It becomes almost a game—seeing how many matches you can get at a time and laughing with your friends at the creepy (and sometimes extremely inappropriate) messages boys send. There’s countless twitter accounts dedicated to the insanely ridiculous conversations that happen in the Tinder world. Come on, do you really think you’re going to win over a girl by messaging her, “You’re hot. Snapchat?” It’s often funny to like people that you already know from home and see it come up as a match. That boy you had a crush on all of high school is now a match two years later? Uh, call me maybe!
However, what I have come to find is that many girls don’t want to admit that they have and use Tinder. Even more so, many girls refuse to message the boys back that they have matched with and have made the first move to initiate conversation. In addition, some girls think the idea of meeting up with a Tinder match is absolutely absurd. Um… hello? What was the point of even downloading the app in the first place?
I was curious (yes, I have a Tinder) as to why other girls who used Tinder felt this way. Yes, my first topic of conversation with someone wouldn’t be my use of Tinder, but I’m not ashamed by it. Were these girls simply just embarrassed? Or were they scared, given that they’re meeting a significant amount of boys though an app (welcome to 2014 I guess)? Some girls that I’ve asked think that it’s just awkward to actually message and talk to a boy that they have liked on Tinder. Girls also say that as for meeting up with boys, a conversation on Tinder has never gotten far enough to get to that level or that the boys are just plain creepy. Plus, they worry that boys are just looking for a hookup and nothing more. Girls also feel that they are too awkward to actually meet face-to-face with someone they matched with on Tinder and just feel more comfortable sticking to messaging.
However, other girls that I’ve talked to have said that they use Tinder with the intention to meet up with boys in person. In fact, one friend that I talked to said that a boy she met on Tinder and actually met in person worked out well for her; they were together at one point! Others have even found their boyfriend while using the app.
Whether you’re just using the app for a confidence booster or to actually find your prince charming, always make sure that you simply have fun with the app. Even if you find someone you’re extremely interested in and he looks good through his Tinder profile, always keep your guard up and be careful when meeting in person (no one wants to be catfished, right?). As for being embarrassed when it comes to having the app on your phone, who cares? Clearly, you’re not the only one. And who knows, maybe in ten years people will be saying that they met their spouse on Tinder… giving a whole new meaning to the term Tinder-ella.