Disclaimer: Please read with caution. Ā This article is meant to be a funny satire. Ā The opinions expressed in this article do not reflect the authorsā or Her Campus BCās feelings towards or positions on any of the topics covered below. Thank you for your understanding.
Ever since Iāve come to college, my use of public bathrooms has increased exponentially. I guess you could call me a public bathroom connoisseur, because I mean I already do. And I believe it is my duty (or doody) to share with you all some simple rules of public bathroom etiquette.
1. Please do not answer your phone while on the toilet. I donāt care if you answer your phone on the toilet in the privacy of your own bathroom at home. In a public restroom it is not okay to carry a conversation while sitting on the porcelain throne. And I will tell you why: 1. Itās gross and obvious that you are playing with your phone on the toilet. Quietly text if you must. 2. There are people on line who at this point desperately need to go. Meanwhile, youāre talking to your mom about the spin class you went to yesterday. 3. I donāt want to hear it.
2. Please wash your hands. Okay so I know you donāt always feel like washing your hands but for the sake of social acceptance JUST DO IT! I donāt like to classify myself as a āgermaphobeā but when someone touches the doorknob with dirty hands, lines have been crossed.
3. The toilet is not an area for contemplation. Weāve all had those days where we just need 5-10 minutes to sit down and have no one talk to us. Public restrooms, however, are not the place to do this. You will understand what Iām talking about when youāre waiting on line of the two-stall bathroom on the fourth floor of OāNeill and thereās a āpoop standoffā going on. Just use the ladies room and wander to a quiet corner of the library for some alone time.
4. Stare at your beauty from afar. You know I love admiring myself in the mirror. But when itās rush hour and people need to use the bathroom, you need to take a step back and look at yourself from afar and be aware of people trying to walk in front of you.
5. Donāt knock twice. I can assure you everything is okay in there. One knock should be enough to see if there is someone in there and let him or her know you are waiting. If you keep knocking, it will only make the both of you annoyed.
6. Please flush. I hate that I actually have to say this but thereās nothing I hate more than being unpleasantly surprised in a public restroom. And I canāt even begin to tell you how many times Iāve lost faith in humanity when walking into a stall with a āpresentā waiting for me. I donāt care how big or small the reminder is, flush however many times it takes for your prior presence to become unknown.
7. Talking to your friend from one stall to another is always a bad idea. Okay, Iāll admit Iām sort of guilty of this. But what happens when your so-called friend leaves you to the wolves and you start talking to a random person? I can assure you, I would not appreciate if a total stranger started asking me how my weekend went while Iām trying to go to the bathroom.
8. Donāt peek over the stall. A lot of times itās fun to scare your friends. But things start to get out of hand when you accidently poke your head into the wrong stall. This happened to me once and I can tell you the unsuspecting victim was not amused.
At this point you might be thinking these few rules are so obvious. However youād be surprised how many times Iāve seen these serious violations of public bathroom etiquette occur.
Ā
Photo Sources:
http://wearebothright.com/tag/public-bathroom/
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