George Clooney, with a moustache – what could be better?
In the final weeks of World War 2, Frank Stokes (Clooney) arranges a mission to rescue artistic masterpieces which have been stolen by the Nazis. In a race against time for these seven ageing museum curators, architects, and historians, they must sneak behind enemy lines to find and save the history of European art culture before Hitlerâs orders to destroy them upon the Third Reichâs fall come into force. Believe it or not, itâs based on a true story. Of course, as with all of these âtrue storyâ films, there are aspects which stand up well to scrutiny against the original story, and aspects which are, shall we say ânot so strongâ; but I couldnât possibly snitch on such a charming movie, youâll have to research it for yourself if you really care.
The real âMonuments Menâ, read more about them here
The Monuments Men is written by Grant Heslov (known for True Lies and Argo) and George Clooney, directed by George Clooney and starring (you guessed it) George Clooney, alongside Matt Damon, Bill Murray, Cate Blanchett, Hugh Bonneville, and John Goodman (aaaand breathe). It also features a charming musical score, which harks aptly back to The Great Escape, by Alexandre Desplat whose work youâll know from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, The Kings Speech and Argo (so just a couple of small productionsâŠ), making this a truly star-studded, feel-good film.
âHeistâ is a little far-fetched for this film regardless of its ambitious tag line: âIt was the greatest art heist in historyâ. Yes, there are plenty of inspirational speeches from Clooney and Damon, and ample time spent gathered around a table analysing maps, but The Monuments Men is more âlost in Paris with no understanding of Frenchâ than Oceans 11.
In the words of Empire magazine, the plot is âinadequately constructedâ (read their not-so-glowing review here), and I agree. Somewhere in the middle of the 118-minute run time things get a little lost, as if Clooney and Heslov disappeared off into their own thoughts for 20 minutes before remembering they were supposed to be writing a screenplay. As a result, my first thought after leaving my seat was something along the lines of âhmm, quite long, wasn’t it.â
I think itâs all too easy to get caught up in the lack of action and excitement and miss the point of The Monuments Men. We live in a world dominated by Hollywood blockbusters which constantly warp our expectations of reality in film â even ostensibly ârealistâ films like Juno are too outrageously funny to truly resemble anything any of us normal people would ever experience. The Monuments Men, the way I see it, is just trying to tell a story; there are no exploding helicopters, no drugs, no sex, not even any rock and roll, just pure, unadulterated reality. And reality can be boring.
Some haunting combinations of music, direction and stunning acting really hit home that, despite all the âtally-ho letâs rescue a Michelangelo from the clutches of the evil Nazisâ, this is a sensitive reconstruction of the closing days of World War 2, perfectly mirroring the emotional mix of elation at seeing the back of the war, and grieving for the men who lost their lives.
Watch if you liked: The Kingâs Speech, Private Peaceful, The Great Escape (1963)
Ratings:
Date Rating: 2€ 5
Unless your other half has a fondness for romantic, actionless war movies and fine art (or he just wants to please you), taking him to see this is probably not going to put you in his best books. However, my heist and car chase-loving fella did endow it with a ânot badâ, so you could give it a go on date night if youâre feeling daring.
Parent-friendly rating: 4/5
Mum and dad will undoubtedly love this. Definitely recommended for girly night in with mum, and the war, mystery and occasional explosions will certainly keep dad content too â although he may feel rather left out when you and your mum are simultaneously blushing as Clooney directs his trademark half-smile-and-gaze straight into your heart…
Girliness: 3/5
Its World War 2 setting may put many girls off The Monuments Men, but underneath its intentionally manly facade (you should feel sorry for poor Clooney and Damon feeling the need to save face with their fellow âmanlyâ men) it is really just a touching story of seven old men and their endearing passion for art, so romantic it makes grown women swoon.
Speaking of swooning, should I shut up about Clooney now? …Hmm, nope.