“To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance” – Oscar Wilde
I’m sure everyone has heard the sometimes cliché sayings, “confidence is key” or “you have to love yourself before you can love anyone else”, but have you ever tried to actually live by these? You don’t need to have an annoyingly large ego that turns people away from you, but you do need to learn to love yourself or you will be in constant state of inner and outer turmoil. In order to have peace with yourself and with others, you must first accept yourself as you and not as a comparison to others.
Self-esteem is especially tough to maintain in developing years or when you have a major life-transition occurring. Whether you’re forced to change schools or careers, or even forced to move on from a severed relationship, your self-esteem is what ultimately takes the beating. The best thing you can do for yourself is to push blame out the door. To blame is to only become stuck in the past of what just occurred, and consequently not allowing yourself to focus on a new game plan. When you blame yourself, you are filled with a sense of self-loathing and rarely are you going to be hopeful for what will come; when you blame others, you only push away those closest to you. Both options sound like a lose-lose, am I right? Focus on your strengths, not on your weaknesses.
Not only does low self-esteem cause you to become stuck in the past and stuck in an altogether rut, but it also can cause some serious psychological problems if it persists. An unhealthy amount of low self-esteem can result in body dysmorphic disorders, like Anorexia Nervosa and Bulimia (most common in females however the awareness of male eating disorders is now on the rise), and also other issues such as depression, anxiety, chronic stress etc. A great read on how self-esteem can act as a sort of “emotional immune system” can be found here: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-squeaky-wheel/201306/does-self-esteem-function-emotional-immune-system
A healthy amount of self-esteem can boost our emotional resilience that helps us deal with whatever life throws at us, whether it is failure, rejection or a loss. Moral of the story: LOVE YOURSELF.
“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.” – Thich Nhat Hanh