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Baguettes and Bureaucracy: How to Survive Long Distance Love

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Exeter chapter.

Your romance started in the middle of second year, you met someone over the summer holidays or you’ve been together for a couple of years, even surviving going to different universities. However, there’s no denying it: one of the biggest dilemmas faced by many of us when commencing our year abroad is handling not only a long distance, but an international relationship.

So before you begin to have sleepless nights over how your year away may ‘change things’, take a deep breath and RELAX. My guide will ensure your year of separation is more of a sunny stroll in the park than a rollercoaster ride!

1. IF you’re feeling low after a difficult day at work/uni:

There are going to be times on your year abroad when all you want is a cuddle in bed, and comfort-eating chocolate is just not doing it. However, there are a few things you can do to ease your craving for cuddles. Firstly and most obviously, there is Skype and various other apps that allow you to have an actual face to face conversation whenever you want. Arranging to have both you and your boyfriend’s Skypes permanently on “available”, will ensure that you are able to get in contact whenever you are having a low point (and even when he is!) Whatsapp is definitely worth installing to be able to send messages to phones abroad for free. As cheesy as it sounds, taking one of your boyfriend’s jumpers or hoodies to wear when you need a fix of him can really help (plus they are very comfy!) Lastly, think positive and arrange a girly night in with your new friends, or get that essay done on evenings when you are feeling down. It will keep you distracted and when you see your boyfriend again, those cuddles will be so much more appreciated.

2. IF the thought of being celibate for months at a time makes you want to explode:

Don’t be afraid to get imaginative with Skype and Whatsapp, but always be aware of what you’re sending and who you’re sending it to – sexting can have unwanted consequences (check out HC’s guide to safe sexting here). Before meeting up after a couple of months of separation, treat yourself (and him) to some sexy new underwear that makes you feel fantastic, it will make your reunion that little bit more special. Finally, there is nothing wrong with a cheeky trip to Ann Summers before you leave


3. IF you are feeling a little left out of all the Exeter news:

There will be days when logging into Facebook and seeing pictures of your boyfriend from the last Timepiece Wednesday, reminding you of when you ALWAYS used to get a burger together before heading home, may lead to Exeter/boyfriend longings. This is especially true if the nightlife in your new country is akin to Saturday night at Arena. On the flip side, your boyfriend may be feeling a little left out of your new, busy, bustling life in your adoptive country.

So, here are a few tips to minimize those wants. Firstly, if you can afford it, organize a trip back to the UK to see your boyfriend before you leave on your year abroad. Knowing that you will be seeing each other at a set date will keep feelings of want at bay, allowing you to focus on enjoying your time away in a new country. Better still, get him to come out to you so he can actually experience the amazing tapas bar that you always go on about and meet all your new friends. Sharing an experience with someone is so much better than just talking about it, which can get a little dull and frustrating if it cannot be fully appreciated over Skype chats.

4. IF you are worried that romance may waver:

The lack of date-nights, be it the whole 2-4-1 Pizza Express and cinema option or Dominoes and a DVD in bed, need not hinder romance whilst you are separated. In fact, being away for the year will allows you to show how much you’re thinking about him in some really different little ways. Although there is a fine line between being romantic and just a bit cringey, here are some ideas to get your romantic thinking cap going (boys pay attention too, please.)

  • Send a postcard from all of the different areas you visit, or even a few postcards from your new town.
  • Little packages, such as a packet sweets that you’ve newly fell in love with, would be so nice to receive, especially as a surprise.
  • A good old fashioned letter that’s been carefully thought about and written is just the best romantic gesture don’t you think!?

 

So hopefully this guide has shown you that your year abroad does not need to be a struggle for you and your partner, in fact it may even help spice up your relationship and take it in new and unexpected directions!

 

photo credits:

www.thedailytouch.com

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