Do you ever find yourself shrugging your shoulders and settling on the “boys will be boys” conclusion? Real Live College Guy Andy is here to show you that mature men do (in fact) exist. He has an uncanny ability to sort out the good guys from the bad apples and is here to bring you the best in college love advice.
I met this guy who frankly seems pretty perfect. He’s sweet to me, doesn’t make me feel pressured to do anything physically, wants to get to know me, and is my “type” if I even have a type. The catch is that he’s always getting texts and messages from other girls when we’re together and always makes it a point to tell me these girls are chasing after him and he is not interested in talking to them whatsoever. And, another girl recently told me I should “be careful” with him because he “gets with a lot of girls” and apparently is always with a girl. So far, he has been very consistent in wanting to hang out with me and in treating me right. Do I have reason to worry? – Falling for a player at Florida State
Falling,
Let’s read back what you just said about this guy, “he’s always getting texts and messages from other girls when we’re together and always makes it a point to tell me these girls are chasing him.”
I’m sorry but does this not scream “cocky SOB” to you? It does to me. Why let yourself fall for this player? Obviously, none of us enjoy hearing about other people pursuing our love interest and certainly we don’t want to hear it straight from the horse’s mouth. The pure mentioning of all these girls hitting on him to you is nothing but him showing off. Who does he think he is? Leonardo DiCaprio?
So yes, you have reason to worry. Especially when you add in that another girl has told you to be careful about him being essentially a serial dater.
As for how perfect this guy may seem, well, that’s his game. They say practice makes perfect? Sure sounds like he’s had a whole lot of practice and he’s certainly picked a few things up on how to act around the ladies. These types of guys are perfectly comfortable lying through their teeth. This guy is quite suave as they say, but it is important to read the warning signs. And in your particular case you have two giant red flags with one being his cocky references about other ladies chasing him and the second being the girl’s advice to be careful.
It’s a pretty safe bet from what you’ve told me that he has been with more than his fair share of gals. What makes you think you’re going to be any different? I’m not saying you should automatically give up on this guy but definitely make sure to keep your guard up.
That said, if I were in your shoes, I’d move on from this chump. His constant references to these other girls chasing him would be a total deal breaker for me. That’s not how you treat a lady.