What He’s Thinking When…: The Guys Told Us Everything

For any girl who has ever come into contact with a boy, you know that boys can be just as, if not more so, confusing than girls. Who knows what they are thinking? Her Campus does! Not so surprisingly, many of the guys we talked to share common mindsets, and let me preface this article by saying that many of the boys polled were also confused on what they thought…typical, right? Let’s begin… What is he thinking when…
 
 
…He Sees You Crying?
 
“I feel bad – I want to know what I did wrong, and how I can get her to stop. I just want it to end” – Pat, University of Illinois
 
“It depends. If I did something wrong, then I feel horrible. If it’s just a female mood swing, then I’m basically frustrated” – John, University of Missouri
 
“To be honest, I feel like the world is ending. It breaks my heart to see that – who wants to make a girl cry? Not me” – Jordan, DePaul University
 
“My ex-girlfriend used to cry all the time in public, and then I just felt embarrassed. I knew everyone around me was thinking how I must be the biggest scumbag” – Joe, University of Colorado – Boulder
 
“In my head, I was always wondering if it were okay to hug her or not, since she was usually crying because of me. She looked so sad, though, and I just wanted to bring her into my arms” – Stan, University of San Diego
 
“Sometimes I’m thinking ‘wow she looks horrible,’ and other times, I am just hoping that it will end soon so we can do something fun” – Mark, Brown University
 
“All I’m ever thinking, on repeat, is ‘wow this sucks’” – Kevin, Syracuse University
 
“If it is the beginning of a relationship, then I am worried because I wonder if she is actually crazy, since I never know why girls are crying” – Jason, Wheaton College
 
“Please, please, please stop. I can’t bear to look at it” – Steve, University of Missouri
 
“Not again” – Matt, University of Illinois
 

…Right Before Your First Kiss
 
“I can’t believe this is happening. I’m so excited” – Pat, University of Illinois
 
“I hope this doesn’t ruin everything. What if it’s bad? Eh…just go for it. I give myself a pep talk in my head” – John, University of Missouri
 
“What did I eat earlier? Does my breath smell? Do I need Chapstick?” – Jordan, DePaul University
 
“YES!!!!!!” – Joe, University of Colorado – Boulder
 
“The thing is, I’m usually not thinking at this moment” – Stan, University of San Diego
 
“Does she want me to kiss her? I am just so happy that I don’t want to even think that she doesn’t want it” – Mark, Brown University
 
“Wow, she really wants me? I’m a lucky guy” – Kevin, Syracuse University
 
“When I first kissed my girlfriend, I swear the entire world stopped. She looked so pretty waiting for me to do it that I absolutely could not wait” – Jason, Wheaton College
 
“Am I sure that I want to be doing this right now?” – Steve, University of Missouri
 
“I’m so nervous, but usually it’s spontaneous. I don’t have time to think because it’s in the middle of the perfect moment” – Matt, University of Illinois
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…During a Fight?
 
“How can I make her feel better?” – Pat, University of Illinois
 
“Usually she is being so ridiculous that I’m wondering why I am even with her” – John, University of Missouri
 
“Wow, I didn’t know she could scream that loud” – Jordan, DePaul University
 
“I honestly didn’t realize that whatever I did would be such a big deal, so I am usually just confused and hoping it will end soon” – Joe, University of Colorad0 – Boulder
 
“How can I flip this around so she is the one who has to apologize?” – Stan, University of San Diego
 
“I hope she doesn’t realize anytime soon that I am tuning her out, and I wish she could see how crazy she looks” – Mark, Brown University
 
“I want this to end, I want this to end, I want this to end…” – Kevin, Syracuse University
 
“I don’t know if this relationship is worth it” – Jason, Wheaton College
 
“It really depends. If I did something wrong, then I just want to fix it. If not, though, then I just want her to get out of my face” – Steve, University of Missouri
 
“This is pointless…life is too short to fight…but then again, how am I going to win this one?” – Matt, University of Illinois
 
…He is About to Meet Your Friends/Family for the First Time?

“I hope they like me. I’m so nervous” – Pat, University of Illinois
 
“I’m just worried that they are all going to be judging me” – John, University of Missouri
 
“What kind of people are they? Am I going to like them?” – Jordan, DePaul University
 
“I hope what I’m wearing is okay…should I have dressed up more? Do I look like I’m sucking up? That’s probably okay…” – Joe, University of Colorado – Boulder
 
“Why does she look so happy? This is torture” – Stan, University of San Diego
 
“Did she really mean what she said about her dad?” – Mark, Brown University
 
“Great. I bet all of her friends hate me already after the stories she has told them. Should I try to explain myself?” – Kevin, Syracuse University
 
“She looks so pretty…why can’t we just hang out alone like we always do?” – Jason, Wheaton College
 
“It depends. If it’s the friends, then I am usually okay, not a big deal. If it’s the family, then I am freaking out about everything from my clothes to if my major is acceptable” – Steve, University of Missouri
 
“Are they going to accept me? Am I up to their standard? Are these people that I want to hang out with?” – Matt, University of Illinois
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…You are Breaking Up
 
“I feel absolutely devastated, even if I was the one who did it. I feel so lost and alone – just really confused, like I’m missing something important” – Pat, University of Illinois
 
“What is wrong with me that she didn’t want to be with me?” – John, University of Missouri
 
“If she dumped me, then I’m just bummed and upset, wanting her back. If I dumped her, then I’m ready to play the field again” – Jordan, DePaul University
 
“In the middle of a break-up, I am always hoping that I don’t cry and that it goes by quickly so I can have some time to myself to think about it” – Joe, University of Colorado – Boulder
 
“What is happening right now?” – Stan, University of San Diego
 
“What do I have to do to make her want to stay with me? I am just trying to get her from leaving so I can fix it” – Mark, Brown University
 
“She looks so hot…break-up sex?” – Kevin, Syracuse University
 
“I am usually the one who does the breaking up in relationships, and there is always a fraction of a second when I question if I’m doing the right thing” – Jason, Wheaton College
 
“I wish it didn’t have to be this way” – Steve, University of Missouri
 
“If I did it or if she did, either way I just want it to be done quick so that I can get with my boys and move on” – Matt, University of Illinois
 

…You First Have Sex?
 
“What if she gets pregnant?” – Pat, University of Illinois
 
“I hope she enjoys this…because I know I’m going to” – John, University of Missouri
 
“I can’t wait to get this started” – Jordan, DePaul University
 
“I wish I had worked out a little more – is she going to be judging me during this?” – Joe, University of Colorado – Boulder
 
“Hell yeah” – Stan, University of San Diego
 
“I wonder if I have to see her again” – Tim, Boston College
 
“I can’t believe this is finally happening” – Kevin, Syracuse University
 
“Is she going to get really attached after this? Wait…am I?” – Jason, Wheaton College
 
“How am I going to compare to the other guys she has been with? How many has she been with?” – Steve, University of Missouri
 
“Is this a mistake?” – Matt, University of Illinois
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…He Realizes He is in Love?
 
“When I see her, or get a text, call, or e-mail from her, there are butterflies in my stomach and a smile on my face. I can’t stop thinking about her no matter what I am doing” – Pat, University of Illinois
 
“I hope she loves me, too. If she doesn’t, then I’m screwed” – John, University of Missouri
 
“When I first realized that I was in love with my girlfriend, I couldn’t believe that it was happening to me – I didn’t really see myself settling down as a teenager” – Jordan, DePaul University
 
“I just feel really happy” – Joe, University of Colorado – Boulder
 
“I just feel so grateful that I have her as a part of my life and that I am able to call her my girlfriend” – Stan, University of San Diego
 
“Once I realize that I’m in love, I start to worry about losing her much more because the stakes are so much higher” – Mark, Brown University
 
“Does she love me?” – Kevin, Syracuse University
 
“I am the luckiest guy in the entire world to have this amazing girl in my life” – Jason, Wheaton College
 
“I realized that I was in love when I saw my girlfriend so many different ways – without makeup, crying, angry – and I still thought she was the most beautiful, perfect person in the entire world” – Steve, University of Missouri
 
“This sucks. Am I going to get hurt?” – Matt, University of Illinois
 
 There you have it, girls…a look into the minds of men, who we love, and who we love to hate. I have to say, though, that after this I’m pretty hopeful – a lot of guys are pretty romantic, and they do care! And now you know what guys are really thinking, courtesy of HC.
 
Sources
College men from across the country

• dating
• love