Have you ever spent an amazing few hours with a guy- and at the end feel as confused as you do at the end of a problem set? There’s nothing worse than spending time with a guy you like and not knowing where you stand in his eyes. Are you just friends? Are you a little more? You feel like you’re living out your very own “Will they? Won’t they?” sitcom. And it can be hard to tell if you’ll ever get to that “will.”
Of course, guys do share what they’re feeling – they just don’t gush about it. Take comfort in the fact that as sophomore Annie claims, “To guys, no girl friend is ever just a friend.” If they’re friends with you, chances are they’ve considered being with you, and wouldn’t be opposed if the opportunity arose. They like you, your personality, and everything that goes with it. Being friends with a guy is a great way to lead to something more.
Hanging out with guy friends and guys you like are usually charged with different dynamics though. If you hang out in groups, are you in mixed company? Or is it a giant bro-fest and you’re the odd (wo)man out? If you act like one of the guys and hang out with only them, he may not be getting a clear picture of what you’re like as an actual girl. When in mixed groups, pairing off is a great sign that you two hit it off and have things to share that only exist between the two of you.
If your guy organizes things so that you two are alone together, things might be looking up. Depending on the situation, he may be interested. Or he could just be purely oblivious. If it’s an activity that you’ve never done before, something out of both of your normal schedules, like going to see a movie alone or getting coffee, then there is a definite date vibe present. Hanging out alone in each other’s rooms may feel romantic, but if it’s what you always do in groups, isn’t it kind of the same thing just with less people?
The key to reading boys is not to overcomplicate things. If an outsider would look at you together and think you’re on a date- then you’re probably on a date. If you question the fact that you’re on a date- then you’re probably not. As one sophomore guy puts it, “If the word date isn’t used, then it’s probably not a date.” It’s important to make things clear. So remember to stay levelheaded and read the situation. You might be happy with what you discover!