“Tis the season, to find a formal date fa la la la la la la la. It might even lead you to a new mate fa la la la la la la la la. PKP, Delt, ATO, and Sig Chi fa la la la la la la la la. All have bumpin’ formals that you should attend fa la la la la la la. Here’s some tips to get you an invite fa la la la la la la la la. And if they don’t work, they must be a Scrooge”.
•Invite a Sigma Chi to go fishing. Show your love, passion and desire to be in close contact with fish. Upon entering Sig Chi’s formal, all the attendees compete to see who eats the most fish. By implementing the idea in your male compadre’s mind that you have a special interest in fishy friends, you might hook a formal date.
•Let your Delt and Phi Kappa Psi pals know how special they are to you this holiday season. Drop yourself off at their door wrapped in Christmas wrapping paper and a classic red bow. It’ll be a gift he can’t resist unwrapping.
•Make sure your Facebook relationship status says that you are single. Even if it already lists this, re-set it so that it appears at the top of your wall for the next month. It’s worth deleting other people’s posts on your wall for.
•Come up with a back-up plan. If all else fails and you don’t get asked, tell friends and boys on campus that you had to go home for an “interview”, “family emergency”, or a “wedding”. This decreases the embarrassment of being alone during the holiday season.
•Two words: repeat offenders. Although we usually look down upon this, unless you are actually trying to get a boyfriend, this is the time to talk and woo your repeat offenders. Worst comes to worst, put an ad on e-services titled “All I Want for Christmas is a Beau”.