If there is one thing that girls know for sure, it’s when they mess with guys. Emotionally, physically, mentally; it’s all the same. We flirty girls know very well the spells we can cast over the unknowing male. Unfortunately for us, this is only a partial control. Having a flirty personality can easily be misinterpreted by the lesser mammals known as men. Just saying hi to a guy can instantly turn into months of agony. “All I said was hi,” you say to yourself. “She is hopelessly in love with me,” he says to himself.
Apparently being friendly is social suicide. Who knew being nice would have such horrible repercussions. Did I miss something, or does our society teach us from the time we are stumbling toddlers to be nice to others? I’m a friendly, outgoing person, and it took me years of suffering through a punk-rock-rebel-I-hate-the-world-dye-my-hair-red-get-a-tattoo-but-where-do-I-fit-in phase to get me to that state. Now what? I have to hold back because guys can’t think with their head? The one on their shoulders, I mean. If a flirty girl decided just to be totally evil to anyone and everyone she wouldn’t find herself in nearly as many romantic death traps, right? Before you get excited, realize that doing this can easily draw in just as many guys. Some men thrive on pain, so the more pain you cause them, the more they will fall in love with you. It’s a strange world we live in. I guess there really is no way to win.
Try as hard as you want, you can never turn off the flirt, or at least what is seen as the flirt. If a guy is desperate, horny, or just pathetic he is going to interpret the slightest giggle as major points in his book. Beware of the flattery to follow. You can only hear “you are the most beautiful girl I’ve ever met” so many times. Be careful not to let this invade your ego, for then you are truly treading dangerous waters.
So I guess there really is no hope for the flirty girl. No matter which plan of attack we choose, we just can’t get rid of those undesirables. This must be our burden to bear. Maybe God decided that blessing us with good looks and a friendly personality was just too much. We have to earn our keep. Pay our dues. Suffer and sacrifice.
There’s no way out. Not even a boyfriend will save you. And I doubt even a husband will.
Let’s all just be lesbians.