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From A Guy’s Perspective: Long Distance

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at U Iowa chapter.

From a Guy’s Perspective: Long Distance

         A long distance relationship is tougher than any average relationship. They’re relationships that include things such as being too far to see each other to not able to see each other on any given weekend, making it a rare pleasure when you get to see them.
But no matter what, they suck.
 
         It’s not that they don’t have their place in the world; it’s just that whenever they happen, they tend to be in some lame situation. Someone’s parents are moving and they have to move too. Someone is transferring to another college or has an internship somewhere, stuff like that.
        
         Much like any relationship, it can’t work out unless the two people are committed to making it work, and this applies even more so with long distance relationships. If two people aren’t equally committed to only each other, then a long-distance relationship will stop working pretty fast, or it will turn into one person being unfaithful, betraying the other.
 
         The only way I would be in a long-distance relationship would be if I was initially dating someone who was nearby, for a long time, and then for some reason one of us had to go somewhere for a finite amount of time before we were reunited. If I was dating a girl for a year in high school, and went to a college far away, a college she came to the following year when she graduated, would be the only reason to try it out.
 
         Well, if we both wanted to.
 
         It would have to be someone I really loved for me to try out something that tends to fails, or at least has the reputation for failing.
 
         That is probably the biggest turnoff to guys (and everyone) for why to not be in a long distance relationship: they think that it has to fail.
Oh, and the complete lack of physical contact… did I forget to mention that?
 
         BECAUSE THAT IS AWFUL!
 
         Think about it, what is the main difference between a boyfriend/girlfriend and just another really cool platonic friend of the opposite sex that you chill out with all the time? It’s the physical stuff!
 
         I don’t care if you are completely asexual and only cuddle with them, it is so awesome to have somebody else to hold hands with and to hug and to kiss and to etc, etc.
That’s the reason it sucks to have a long-distance relationship. Girls feel it. Guys definitely feel it. And it ends up ruining everything.
People get frustrated about not seeing each other, touching each other, and they end up getting upset about everything else just a bit more. People get frustrated and make mistakes by doing the big nasty with people they don’t really care about, but are convenient and slutty.
 
         The solution to avoid the destruction of a long-distance relationship (or any relationship)? Talk to your significant other. Tell your other what’s going on, remind them of why you’re with each other in the first place and that you’ll see each other in a short X-amount of months.
If you don’t talk at least once a week, then are you two even able to pretend to be together?
 
         Overall, yes, long-distance relationships can work, but to work they need work to be put in by both people. They need two people who are equally committed to each other. They need two people to communicate with each other.
Not every guy would agree to a long-distance relationship, but if they do, then they’re willing to try.
 

Peter Frankman is an underclassman at the University of Iowa from Burbank, California. He has a few addictions in his life: writing, reading, heavy metal, Adult Swim, and any movie with zombies. He joined The University of Iowa's Her Campus team as the writer of the "From a Guy's Perspective" articles in January 2011 and hasn't looked back since (except to make sure he doesn't write the same article twice). Peter's a major in both Journalism and Creative Writing and hopes to become a writer in some way, shape or form after he graduates. That or the President of the United States, he hasn't really focused too much to say anything decisive yet... or maybe he has, we're not quite sure. If he had to choose a night of guilty pleasures it would include the Beastie Boys, Monster Import: Light, Zebra Cakes, and a marathon of subpar movies that he thinks are amazing (Blade, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Fast and the Furious, etc).
Nicole Lumbreras is a junior at University of Iowa, class of 2012, studying Journalism and Sociology. Born and raised in the suburbs of Chicago, Nicole loves to explore new restaurants, see live music and attend sporting events. Nicole loves to travel, dance, write in her blog and takes pleasure in the art of photography. Nicole loves to spend time with her friends and family, and when time allows she will get her fill of Bad Girls Club, Glee, So You Think You Can Dance, and Grey's Anatomy. Nicole recently got foot surgery and rediscovered running; her goal is to run a half marathon before she is 25. After college she plans to move into the city (Chicago) with a American bulldog, attend graduate school at night and hopefully write for Chicago Magazine or another fun and upcoming project.