IMO: shows primarily featuring women should be written from the female gaze, and these shows are the best shows. If you’ve never heard of the female gaze before, it’s essentially when characters in the media are written from the realistic point of view of a woman –– AKA women aren’t being overly sexualized nor are they just constantly fighting over a man as their main challenge.
The female gaze encapsulates the actual problems and emotions that many women commonly face in our society while minimizing trope-y cop-outs like love triangles or hot-and-cold relationships with men. It strays away from seeing women as objects and instead sees them as living, breathing human beings rather than symbols or images.
These five shows do an excellent job of showcasing the female gaze, and I hope you think so, too!Â
5. Big Little Lies (2017-2019)
Motherhood, grief, painful marriages… and an all-star cast of Reese Witherspoon, Nicole Kidman, ZoĂ« Kravitz, Shailene Woodley and even Meryl Streep?! Big Little Lies follows the lives of four mothers whose children go to the same school, navigating the joy and heartache that comes with friendship, romantic partners and even raising children. The plot is so intense with twists and turns involving murder and secrets, and each episode leaves you wanting more.Â
The reason why I argue this show is written from the female gaze is that it does a great job of exploring the pressures of keeping up an image of the “perfect mother” while balancing the conflict of personal identity and relationships. Shailene Woodley’s character, for instance, struggles as a young single mom while trying to manage the impact of a traumatic experience with her son’s father. The emotion and desperation behind each character make it seem so realistic and human.
Not to mention that Reese Witherspoon’s character’s marriage to who I’m claiming is the pinnacle of the female gaze (Adam Scott) is a great example of the will to communicate and connect with your partner while owning up to a huge mistake. This storyline honestly just completely absorbs you!Â
This show does deal with some sensitive themes, so I recommend searching up the content warnings before diving in.
4. Good Girls (2018-2021)
OMG I love this show so much — and I’m heartbroken that it’s been cancelled after four seasons. In any case, this show is definitely worth the rewatch because it’s so funny, clever and even relatable.Â
Christina Hendricks, Mae Whitman and Retta play three mothers who are struggling to support their families. Beth (Christina Hendricks) finds out that her husband has cheated on her while taking out several loans and mortgages without her knowledge, forcing their family into debt. Annie (Mae Whitman) is desperate for money to keep her ex from winning custody of their child, and Ruby’s (Retta) daughter needs expensive medical care that their family can’t afford. Naturally, the three women decide to rob a grocery store, which actually turns out to be a front for a mob boss’ crime syndicate.Â
This show emphasizes how far women will go to protect their families, particularly through its metaphor of invisible labour. The three characters struggle through all four seasons to make ends meet by sacrificing their own safety to launder money and commit crimes for the mob boss while balancing the issues that come along with motherhood and marriage. A true showcase of the unnoticed work women do to get by, this show speaks to the strength required to navigate these challenges in an extremely comedic way. Worth the watch for sure!
3. Killing Eve (2018-2022)
Give me any show with Sandra Oh and Jodie Comer and I am here for it. Eve (Sandra Oh) becomes a secret agent for the U.K’s MI6 intelligence agency and is tasked with following the extremely skilled assassin Villanelle (Jodie Comer). The two gradually develop an obsession with each other in a dangerous game of cat and mouse. It’s gritty, clever, intense and even psychopathic.
Not only was this show’s first season written by the incredible Phoebe Waller-Bridge (who you’ll see shine in my #2 show), but its storyline absolutely pulls you in by showing how complicated tension and competition between women can be. The two main characters are only focused on one another — no man in between them like a typical love triangle trope — and it shows how intricate female relationships can be. Even more amazing, Villanelle is such a badass. The misconception that assassins or hitmen are just men? Absolutely crumbled.Â
By the way, by the time this article is published, the fourth and final season will have premiered. So go ahead and enjoy!Â
2. Fleabag (2016-2019)
WATCH. THIS. SHOW. Fleabag (Phoebe Waller-Bridge) struggles with identity, love and life goals while mourning the guilt and loss of her best friend and navigating her rocky family life. What makes this show unique is that Fleabag regularly breaks the fourth wall and talks directly to the camera as if she and the audience share a relationship. It creates a sense of intimacy with the viewer that carries through both seasons.Â
Fleabag is a comedic and hopelessly romantic show that exemplifies the longing and grief of not only wanting someone special but wanting to be someone special. Fleabag’s character feels lost and incomplete so she fills this void with meaningless flings, which only makes her problems worse. I feel like this show is so relatable because it expresses the inner desire and desperation that a lot of us experience when we want to be comforted and validated.Â
Even better, when I first began the show’s second season, I was so, so scared that it wasn’t going to live up to the amazing writing of the first season, which happens to a lot of shows. But I was blown away when the second season was somehow even more incredible than the first one, as it features Fleabag falling in love with — and you’ll never guess this one — a priest, played by the awe-inspiring Andrew Scott. If it sounds taboo and a little risque, it is — and it’s very well done.Â
This show was my #1 for a very long time until it was just slightly overtaken by…Â
1. My Mad Fat Diary (2013-2015)
Okay, I need to dedicate a whole article to this show — I’m pretty sure I binge-watched the whole thing in just three days.Â
My Mad Fat Diary follows teenager Rae in 1990s U.K. as she leaves her stay at the mental health ward of a hospital and joins a new group of friends. Rae has a larger body and struggles with the challenge of fitting in and the desire to be popular, especially in comparison to her beautiful best friend (who is played by Killing Eve’s Jodie Comer!)Â
This show is the ultimate example of the female gaze because it portrays the female adolescent experience so realistically — I literally felt like this show was based on the pages of my own high school diary. Rae struggles with her negative body image while crushing on the boys in her friend group, and at one point she even gets into a relationship with one of the hottest boys in school but breaks up with him because of her insecurities. She battles with her self-worth and her relationship with her family members as she tries to become stronger and more confident in herself.
The scenes in this show are so well-written and they really pull on your heartstrings. There is one that you might’ve seen on social media where Rae and her boyfriend are locked in a bathroom and she explains why she can’t understand why her boyfriend even likes her. There’s also a powerful scene where Rae speaks to her inner child during a therapy session. If you’re anything like me, you will bawl your eyes out and relate to her feelings as Rae learns to love herself.
And guess what? You can watch the entire series completely free on CBC Gem, so you’ve got no excuse!
The female gaze honestly isn’t as complicated nor as inaccessible as Hollywood makes it seem. It’s a shame that so many films and TV shows are centred around the male gaze especially when the female gaze is so realistic and touching for all audiences! With these five shows, you’ll definitely catch on to what it’s like to see things from the view of a woman and it’ll undoubtedly grab you right in the feels.
Do you have a female gaze-based TV show I should watch? Let me know!