It’s something I’ve heard time and time again when talking about my plans after high school: “You’ll find your soulmate in college.” Now I’m sitting here on a Saturday night (the Saturday after St. Patrick’s Day, nonetheless) on my couch, in my pajamas, incredibly single typing this for you all.
But I’ve learned something in the numerous years I’ve been single: it’s not all bad, and it’s also not our fault.
Has covid impacted our ability to meet people?
Absolutely it has! Not only are we all covering half of our faces now, but everyone’s afraid to walk up to someone they’ve never met and ask them out. Getting to know someone the past two years has been not only scary but possibly dangerous, should they happen to be infected with COVID.
With the virus, face-to-face meetings were at a standstill, and everything went online. Now you can order food, movies, groceries and really anything you could possibly need without ever having to see another person. This era of contactless-ness has created yet another barrier for those of us looking to find someone we have a connection with.
What about social media?
God, this is rough. Call me a romantic, but I’d like someone to ask me out face to face. I’m so over the “can I get your Snapchat?” pickup line. NO, YOU CAN’T. I do not want to be spammed for streaks, that’s not sexy.
Our generation seems to have relocated our flirting field to our phone screens, and that’s honestly so sad. Tell me, how many romcoms have started by someone asking someone else for their Snapchat? Yeah. That’s what I thought.
Learning about someone on a screen can be misleading, uncomfortable and downright horrible. So many people lie when they’re on their phones because it’s so easy. This creates a dating minefield for those of us looking for someone real.
So what do we do about our single statuses?
I see two possibilities:
A) step out of your comfort zone and chat someone up, see where it goes!
or
B) stay single.
Now I’m sure idea B has you a little sad, but I’m here to tell you that being single can be so much fun.
Being in a relationship is hard work, even for soulmates. You have to make time to integrate someone new into your life, learn all sorts of things about them, and keep them interested. Not to mention that you have to compromise.
Ugh. Being single, you have to do none of these things! You only make time for yourself and the things you want to do, you learn about yourself and you do whatever the hell you feel like.
Do you want to rewatch your favorite movie for the fifth time this week and sob? Me too!
Want to scream-sing to all your favorite songs in the car and not worry about your horrendous voice cracks? This is my every day.
Being alone enables you to be free from having to impress anyone. You only have you to take into account.
Being single also allows you to learn so much about yourself. You are capable of being alone, I promise. It may sound hard but try it. I mean really try it. Being alone doesn’t automatically mean you’re lonely. When no one else is around, you’re free to do whatever you feel like doing with no pressure. You are exactly who you are with no filters, lies, or compromises.
Now’s the time to learn everything about yourself that you can, because you’re about to be thrown into the real world, which is incredibly horrifying, so you should try to be as prepared as you possibly can be. Truly knowing who you are, especially when you’re alone, can really help you in the long run.
Our society has constantly told us that we need to be in a relationship to be truly happy, but God, it can feel so good to be single. And you won’t be single your whole life, I guarantee it, so enjoy the peace while it lasts. You may meet someone tonight, tomorrow, next week: you never know. Then, you’ll be missing your life when all you had to worry about was finding the proper body pillow to snuggle with at night.
Here’s hoping that you spend some time with yourself, and also maybe meet someone you’ll fall head over heels for soon, but take your time. So much love to you <3