Who needs genuine compliments anymore when a high score etched on the top right corner of a page can do so much more? Really though, academic validation is sweet. I mean, how could you not like it? A good grade is concrete proof that you’re a competent and dignified person. Right? Well, yes and no.
As a female-identifying person, I often get the sense that we subconsciously feel the need to prove that we are smart in order to dismantle ridiculous gender stereotypes and avoid “mansplaining”.
(The other day, a man felt the need to explain to me that books in the library are arranged in alphabetical order; it’s seriously an issue.)
Moreover, for those of us with learning exceptionalities, academic validation can be especially addicting. In my personal experience, I was always behind the other kids in elementary school, and it was hard seeing my classmates get better grades than me when I was putting in twice the work and effort.
However, once I got that first A+ (that I waited a long time for) I held onto that feeling and felt the need to stay there for as long as I could.
All this to say that the thirst for academic validation is justified, but it’s not something that we should rely on.
For Those Who Thrive Off Academic Validation…
If we focus on what we haven’t achieved then we are missing out on what we have achieved. If you continue to focus on the next best thing instead of all the amazing things that you have already accomplished, (be it academic or not), then all that’s ahead is a case of academic burnout and a heavy sense of emptiness.
Keep in mind that your worth is not tied to your grades! Believe me, I know how terrible it is when your friends share their much higher grades with you; it sucks. Grade sharing, in general, is toxic in my opinion and life would be so much easier if that pressure was not added onto our already ever-present school stress.
University is only the beginning of your professional life. Academic careers are not meant for everyone and there is a multitude of other careers that don’t require straight A’s. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t try your best in school, it’s always good to do that, but please know that you are so much more than your grades.
In the grand scheme of things, the kinds of grades that you got will only make for a footnote in the story of your life.