ICYMI, the Variety Hitmakers’ Awards happened on Dec. 2 and one particular interaction on the show’s red carpet has sparked an important discussion on queerness. You’re probably familiar with Billie Eilish, the 21-year-old superstar known for hits like “Bad Guy” and “Happier Than Ever.” By now, you’ve probably seen her latest Instagram post in which she called out Variety for outing her. In case you haven’t, allow me to catch you up to speed. Even though Eilish had mentioned her attraction to women in her Nov. 13 cover story for Variety, she was asked about her sexuality during the red carpet event and later accused the outlet of “outing” her. If you ask me, it was an irresponsible, problematic move on Variety’s part.Â
In her cover story interview, Eilish told Variety that she’s “never felt like [she] could relate to girls very well,” before admitting she’s had romantic crushes on them. “I love them so much. I love them as people. I’m attracted to them as people. I’m attracted to them for real,” Eilish added.
This marked the first time that Eilish explicitly admitted to liking women, so many took it as the singer’s official “coming out.” But as Eilish later pointed out, that’s not at all how this works.Â
While on the red carpet at Variety Hitmakers’ Awards, a Variety reporter asked Eilish if she “meant to come out” in her cover story for the magazine. The star responded, “I didn’t realize people didn’t know,” before criticizing the whole idea that a queer person must “come out” in the first place. “Why can’t we just exist?” she asked. “I’ve been doing this for a long time and I just didn’t talk about it.”
Eilish handled the awkward moment like a champ, but wasn’t afraid to call out this invasive question afterwards on Instagram. “Thanks Variety for my award and also outing me on a red carpet on 11am instead of talking to me about anything else that matters. I like boys and girls leave me alone about it please literally who cares,” she captioned a series of photos from that night.Â
And she has a huge point, y’all. Why did the Variety reporter want to know more about her sexuality than the work she was receiving an award for?
As a member of the LGBTQ+ community myself, I was appalled watching this happen to one of Gen Z’s biggest stars. Not only is it setting a harmful precedent for the media industry, it’s simply not ok to ask someone to come out. The fact that identifying as straight is considered the norm unless someone tells you otherwise — as well as the need for us to hide who we love — stems from outdated and discriminatory practices.
We’ll talk about our sexuality on our own terms, and we’re definitely not going to let our dating lives define us. Celebrating queerness is important, but Eilish’s purpose of attending the Variety event was to celebrate her music.
Outing someone is just wrong, and I really hope this incident teaches people to think twice before they ask a person about their sexuality. Â