Swifties, y’all cracked the code. When the Taylor Swift countdown clock hit 2:00 p.m. EST on April 18, Blondie gifted us with the lead single of The Tortured Poets Department, “Fortnight” featuring Post Malone, in an exclusive CD. If you ask me, this duo is a match made in heaven, but the meaning behind the song is even better, and it has Matty Healy all over it. Posty and Blondie, you really did something here with the “Fortnight” lyrics.
While Swift is a mega-star, “Fortnight” provides that she’s just like me, forreal. Writing a breakup album that’s (mostly) about a chaotic, one-month situationship that happened after a six-year relationship is totally something I would do. The pop star and the indie band frontman only dated for a brief summer, but it looks like the relationship is for the history books. While Swift hasn’t said if “Fortnight” is about Matty Healy, if I were him, I’d count my days.
Swift starts the song by singing “I was supposed to be sent away / But they forgot to come and get me / I was a functioning alcoholic / ‘Til nobody noticed my new aesthetic,” which seems to be a callback to her 2022 album Midnights, where her lyrics talked a lot about drinking and smoking. “Lavender Haze,” anyone?
Then, in the first chorus, Swift sings, “And for a fortnight, there we were, forever running / ‘Til you sometimes ask about the weather / Now you’re in my backyard, turned into good neighbors / Your wife waters flowers, I wanna kill her.” Looking at the lyrics, it seems as though this is Swift talking about a brief, secretive affair — but after, they still have to be cordial with each other without letting anyone know about their history. Sounds familiar.
Post then hops onto the song, and the two sing “I love you, it’s ruining my life / I touched you for only a fortnight / I touched you, but I touched you.” which also alludes to a swift (wink) affair in Blondie’s life. ICYMI, a “fortnight” is a period of time that spans over two weeks. While Swift and Healy dated for like, technically two fortnights (?), you can’t deny the metaphor here.
Finally, at the end of the song, Swift closes out the lead single with the lyrics “My husband is cheating, I wanna kill him.” Swift hasn’t spoken much about why her fling with Healy, or even her longtime relationship with Alwyn, ended, but after this track, we can definitely assume there was some infidelity in one of Swift’s relationships. Alright, boys, who hurt Mother?