I have been a Taylor Swift fan for half of my life. For ten years I have gone to her concerts, memorized all the words to her songs, and posted about her on my blog, which she follows on Tumblr. Throughout the years I have also been an active member of the Taylor Swift Defense Squad. Whenever someone points out, “Has she ever considered that maybe she’s the problem?” or complains, “All she ever writes about are her breakups,” I am ready to provide counter-evidence, equipped with a list of songs that prove them wrong. For a while after 1989 was released, it seemed like the days of “Taylor hate” being trendy were over. She was winning countless awards, her style was flawless and everyone obsessed over her relationship with Calvin Harris. But as soon as they broke up, the familiar headlines and jokes returned. My Twitter feed is filled with headlines like “A Timeline of Taylor’s Love Life” and “Why Can’t She Keep A Man?” My friends have asked me, “Does this mean we are going to get a new album sooner?” The way people have reacted to this breakup is totally wrong, and it’s about time that everyone changed their perspective.
It’s completely unfair that Taylor Swift is the one receiving the brunt of the negative feedback following her split. I have not seen a single headline asking how Calvin may have contributed, let alone a single headline about Calvin, period. In fact, we’ve seen the opposite—even from publications that tend to take a pro-women stance. In its piece covering Calvin’s response to the rumors last night, Refinery29 lauded the DJ for his “mature” response, going on to say, “We hope that this leads to a Taylor Swift album of measured respect for her ex-lover.” …because a girl being honest about her emotions wouldn’t be “mature”?
The only truth here is that a relationship came to an end & what remains is a huge amount of love and respect
— Calvin Harris (@CalvinHarris) June 2, 2016
Taylor should not be so heavily criticized for the way she approaches love in her songwriting. She is able to take some of her most painful experiences and channel them creatively into making music that has helped millions of people cope with their own heartbreak. To twist that narrative into something shameful is unjust and inherently sexist. Other artists, including male artists, write and sing about their past relationships all the time. However, somewhere along the line Taylor became the poster child for slut-shaming and she’s never been able to shed that stereotype.
Taylor Swift has a list of incredible accomplishments that is much longer than her list of rumored exes. She has won more Billboard Music Awards than any other artist, has ten Grammys (she is the youngest artist to win Album of the Year and the only female artist to win Album of the Year twice), and has won almost 300 other awards for her music, tours and social media presence over the past decade. This week she became the youngest person on Forbes’ list of the richest self-made women, and has been named the most charitable celebrity for four years in a row. Her multiple Guinness World Records, including “Most million-selling weeks on US albums charts” and “Most simultaneous US Hot 100 hits by a female,” are among the accolades that cement her as one of the greatest artists of all time, yet people cannot let go of the jokes about her love life and instead use them to undermine her success.
Whether or not you like Taylor’s music—or even if you like her as a person—allowing the sexist remarks about her to continue is bad for women everywhere. Women who have been able to turn their pain from past experiences into a multimillion dollar empire should be celebrated instead of criticized. Taylor’s generosity, openness and independence are traits that everyone can look up to, and she has inspired scores of her fans to pursue their dreams fearlessly. Her breakup with Calvin is undoubtedly a sad period in her life, and all this negative attention in the press and on social media is undoubtedly making it harder for her to heal. The next time you hear someone say “Calvin better watch out, Taylor is going to write a song about him!” think about what that comment means, and whether you actually find it funny. Tearing down Taylor Swift for her life choices may be popular, but it is not productive and there are better uses of your time than perpetuating the stigma surrounding women baring their emotions.